How to balance everything I want to do in one hour? Eat breakfast, write a blog, do a 20 minute jog on the treadmill, get showered, dress and be out the door to fill up with gas before heading off to work? I’ve managed it for 2 weeks now but I am getting burned out and yet I know I must continue the pace if I am to achieve my weight loss goals as well as better health. I can only imagine how mothers feel when they have to deal with a husband and children and it is no wonder that they neglect themselves. If they manage to include their own health in the process I can only say, well done. It’s all this juggling that has me feeling desperate for retirement.
I wonder if retirement has all the answers I need for what I see as my problems. Like being disorganized at home. At work I find myself organized and well balanced but at home it’s as though I let myself go. Clothes lying on my chair instead of being hung up or put away, dishes remaining on the counter for two days and dustballs everywhere. When I look around I feel this sense of disconnection with myself and it makes me irritable. Where is the neat and tidy person that I used to be?
Never mind, retirement will fix it all. That’s what I keep telling myself. As well, I think that what does it matter if the dishes take two days to wash up instead of immediately? Whose going to see it and will anyone die because of the neglect? Sometimes when I go on my cleaning binges I tell myself “leave the kitchen until last because the dishes will always get done” so you can see that I really must be sane if I can say that. But on a regular day when I see the dishes I feel like screaming. I want things to be clean and tidy. I can understand why women hire illegal Mexicans for their housekeepers because they are desperate to have a clean house and can probably not afford to pay the wages that ought to be paid.
Yes, it’s just another manic Monday, wish it were Sunday.
No comments:
Post a Comment