Opening Up

Nine months into my retirement and I find myself as busy as ever but when I settle down to write I wonder “what shall I say”?  I find myself experiencing new things almost every day simply by stepping out into the garden and looking at what is happening on my acres.  I’ve been lying beside the infamous pond (the scene of my recent accident) and have discovered that salamanders can live underwater for days at a time.  As you may recall I had quite the shock last year when I discovered 2 salamanders living in the roots of my peony.  I’ve never been able to putz around that plant since, at least with any sort of confidence that I wouldn’t confront something gruesome in its depths.  I watch the bird feeders regularly and this year we have encouraged mourning doves and yellow finches to frolic along with the usual chickadees, sparrows, nuthatches, orioles and various black birds.  I’ve learned that I need to water, water, water those darn seedlings and then water some more.  I’ve learned that even the toughest plants need to get shade when it’s 30 degrees in the greenhouse.

Nature is grand, it is soothing and it keeps one busy from early in the morning until late in the evening.

What I haven’t learned is how to slow down.  I feel as though I need to keep on doing, doing, doing.  I feel guilty if I am not doing something at some point during the day.  During the weekends, it’s not so much of a problem because IT’S THE WEEKEND.  But Monday through Friday I feel as though it’s important for me to be busy, and of course there is plenty to do.  But I have not mastered the art of taking it easy, slowing down, smelling the roses for more than 5 minutes.

So I sit at my keyboard and I wonder, does anyone want to know this?  Probably not.

What I can say is that one has to learn to Lean In to Retirement, just like any other career. Make it your own, shape it the way you want it to look, be, live, work.  Relish it any which way you can.  And I guess that’s a learning too.

Slamming People

It’s a rare thing to find someone who doesn’t say something about another person in a negative way, at some point in their lives.  So who am I to throw the first stone?

As one gets older, however, one prefers not to speak ill of others.  For one thing, it’s simply just the right thing to do.  It’s also politically correct if you are working as a professional.  It’s much better to just let people be and if you are really in disagreement with who they are, why not just avoid them and be done with that dose of negativity?

I’m not a fan of reality shows, I dislike people being mean to each other.  I don’t like people making fun of people on the Red Carpet, I just think being mean in public is as low as you can go.

Now I come to the point.  Are we reverting back to the days before the 1993 election when the PCs began running campaigns featuring Jean Chretien’s distorted face?  What on earth are they thinking by running an ad mocking Justin Trudeau?  I simply could not believe what I was hearing and seeing.  Are we going as low in politics as the American campaigns where you simply don’t know who is running except to NOT vote for that one or the other? 

When a party begins a campaign by slamming the other candidates rather than running on their record, the current issues, and their model for the future, well, I would say it’s a sign that the party is in desperate trouble.  Remember the 1993 results?  The PCs were demolished.  Is this déjà vu?

Practical Steps

While the days are particularly hot I have been studying via the Internet on my hobby of gardening.  What a fantastic tool at one’s fingertips.

How to grow asparagus, when to water a bougainvillea, should a fuchsia be in the shade or have plenty of sunlight? What plants attract butterflies and which plants should go next to each other?  I have realized that my memorization skills are not what they used to be and I am not completely sure why that is.

Fortunately we have “Favorites” available on the computer although I have not mastered the skill of organizing them in a proper filing system (is there a way?).  Occasionally if I know that I will definitely reference the information more than once in the season I will print the information off and put it in my notebook so it’s handy (then I just have to find the notebook).  Yes, it’s very true, in retirement a person quickly loses some of the skills that were her bread and butter in her working days.  This may be due in great part to too many projects happening one after the other so a girl cannot look about her without finding a pile of paper everywhere.  What happened to the “handle every paper only once” philosophy so handy during the working day?  I really cannot say.

So my friends, I have no words of advice on how to stay organized.  If anyone has that nailed down, do let me know.

Space, Lovely Space

Living in the country one may get used to wide open spaces and take freedom for granted.  But it is surprising how space can be confining when what was plenty for one becomes crowded when even the quietest “two” intrudes on their space.

I can understand why marriages becomes strained when one or other of the spouses retires and is suddenly home 24/7.  The person who had already been staying home is now being monitored, judged, questioned, or simply harassed by the new person who finds themselves at a loose end.  I reiterate what I have said before in this blog, it is essential that both husbands and wives have plenty of hobbies, interests and events to occupy themselves in retirement.  If you have someone at your shoulder for every minute of the day it can get very wearing in no time at all.  If you are not used to holding someone’s hand, in giving undivided attention to someone for every waking minute you are going to have a falling-out in record time.

So ladies and gentlemen, get your notebooks out and start writing down a list of things that you have dreamed of doing, things you enjoyed doing when you were a child, a teenager, and a young person.  Dancing, music, reading, playing sports, researching history, butterflies, bird watching, drawing cartoons, designing clothes, paper dolls, creating new automobile designs, taking apart bicycles, engines, motors, building model airplanes, doll houses, bird houses, quilting, embroidery, knitting, crocheting, scrapbooking, genealogy, volunteering at a soup kitchen, a school, etc. 

You need to take a seriously look at what you enjoy doing, you need to take care of your health in order to be able to keep up with your interests and activities, and for gosh sakes, you need to cut your partner some slack so you don’t end up quarreling with each other.

And always remember, you need to ensure that you have the financial ability to retire and keep up with your interests so it’s important to look at the things within your price range.  Many things are essentially free to do, or can be done on a limited budget.

One Handed Gardening

I love flowers and I love the fantasy of having a wonderful garden where one can wander about the paths and lanes created artistically to keep the fantasy of a nature wonderland alive.

Crashing to earth, the reality is a lot of hard work to get just a fraction of the fantasy.  This year we experienced an outbreak of dandelions as I have never seen before.  Virtually one half of my acre of lawn was yellow with the noxious weed.  I have used Curtail, I have used the dandelion bar, I have cut and plucked, pulled and cursed but now I have a field of fluff exploding and seeding for another horrific year.

On the greenhouse side of my fantasy I have learned that you can steam the plants until they literally cook in the clear plastic covers you put on the pots.  Where do you draw the line between encouraging sprouting and cooking?  Somewhere around midnight perhaps?  The truth is very simple, while gardening can be fun and exciting it is also a very demanding hobby in that one must be attentive at all times.  Gardening on a serious (as “in retirement”) scale is pretty much a full time job.

Let’s not forget watering which is HUGE, simply huge, in gardening.  Hoses, many hoses, are required to handle nearly 3 acres of garden plots.  Not that all 3 acres are planted, but the surrounds are.  Hence the hose.  Water jugs are good also, useful in tight places.

An extra pair of hands, weed whackers, lawn mowers, spades, shovels, rakes, and lots of toweling required.  Toweling, you may wonder, until you have seen my face after wiping the sweat from my brow and upper lip.  When my brother sees me he does the Nazi salute because I am inevitably wearing a Hitler mustache in dirt!

But I am having fun.

Political Triumph

The day I fell and broke my wrist was the same day of the Alberta provincial election took place and while I was waiting to get my arm set I kept asking the nurses if I’d be out so I could still vote.  Lucky for me that was allowed. 

It’s been a month and I still feel as though I have to pinch myself in order to realize that the NDP gained a majority government.  Despite the polls I just didn’t think it was going to happen but I am certainly very thrilled with the win.  It is going to be an interesting 4 years but I have a lot of confidence in Rachel Notley and her leadership. 

Curiously enough I happen to be reading a book by Wilkie Collins called “The Fallen Leaves” which predicts the advent of social reform in the 1870’s.  By the turn of the century reforms were beginning to happen and by the 1920’s were well on the road to social equity for the masses.  Fifty years after that and suddenly the momentum slowed, then screeched to a halt and now is slowly, year by year moving backwards into a divide of Have’s and Have Not’s.

One of the things that makes me angry about this (and believe me there is more than one thing) is that today we pay a minimum of 34% in income tax, then we pay for Canada Pension Plans and Employment Insurance, property taxes and GST, as well as other, hidden taxes.  Government receives a substantial amount of money from the average person and yet those who govern us consider our Expectations for those Taxes to be “entitlements”.  I do not think that having our children adequately educated is an entitlement, it is a necessity.  I believe that complete health care is essential in a civilized country.  In this day and age we should have good infrastructure (roads, highways, bridges).

Individuals should not be the only ones paying for these things, those who are reaping huge profits should pay their fair share of taxes because it is what is correct in a civilized world.  I find it unfathomable that anyone cannot understand the concept of ratios and fairness.  I find it especially problematic when that individual is a supposed Christian. 

This is not new in this blog as I’ve written along these lines before.  What is new is that we now have the opportunity to see what this particular government can do.  And we can observe what sort of media coverage this government will get.  And what corporate cooperation they will get.  Do you have your binoculars handy?

Retirement Slowdown

The month of May was a tremendous spring, warm and sunny after 5 years of non-spring.  One morning in early May I was inspired to clean out the dregs in my infamous pond and shortly afterwards my feet flew out from under me and I went crashing down, throwing arms out to break the fall.  Instead I broke my left wrist and have spent the month of May bemoaning the momentum of my projects as well as enjoyment of spring.

In the time that I have not spent feeling sorry for myself I have thought about how very tough people have it who have no hope of recovering the use of their limbs.  I only am out of commission for 8 weeks and while it is frustrating I ought to be counting my blessings.  At the same time I definitely find myself realizing that my level of patience for myself is next to zero.  I had no idea that I am not given to cutting slack for myself.  I find myself wanting to do the same ordinary things “as usual”.  But I cannot tie my shoes, floss my teeth or tighten up my bed sheets.  How many times do I want to fly off the handle?  A dozen times a day.  I have to apologize to my mother every night for being short with her, simply because I cannot do things for myself and she isn’t doing it fast enough for me. 

Who is this monster?  It’s horrible.

My family and friends tell me this is a sign that I ought to slow down.  That irritates me because I am not going fast enough!  But over the last few weeks, when they say slow down, I breathe deeply and finally it has come to me.  It’s not a question of slowing down, it’s a matter of being humble.  The truth is that I have been too cocky in my retirement without realizing it.  It’s time to re-evaluate my priorities and smell a few roses (or stink weed) in order to get my head on straight.  After all, I am not a spring chicken!