Rumour Mills and Mother Nature

Have you ever found yourself caught up in rumours without even being aware of it?  While this can happen in any social group the most common rumour mill happens at work.  The conversation can begin innocently enough with the words “have you heard” but very quickly the conversation can escalate to a lot of different types of speculations.  As you walk away you can feel very upset in the tummy and your head can be in a whirl.  On calmer reflection you can go back to the original statement and realize that everything that stemmed after it was at best speculation, at worst completely false.  After a few of these encounters (if the first experience wasn’t lesson enough) it certainly behooves one to steer clear of any conversation that begins with “have you heard”.

As soon as a person enters the world, leaving the sanctuary of the family home, one becomes vulnerable to all the uncertainties that others may throw at one.  These uncertainties come in all forms, sizes and ways that can be very confusing to the unsuspecting and inexperienced.  As a young girl of 19 I found myself wondering about my colleagues in my second full time job.  I was one of 8 women, the youngest of the lot but it didn’t take me more than a very few weeks to realize that I had landed in a poisonous situation.  The setup was rather unusual in that we were split into 2 groups of 4 for our coffee and lunch breaks but then every second week two of us would move into the other group.  I was very shocked to experience the hypocrisy of the women who would first gossip about the 4 absent ones, and then when the reshuffle happened, they would gossip about the 2 who were now in the other group.  Only one cycle of this was sufficient for me to realize that I was also a target of these Unmagnificent 7.  I found it extremely upsetting because I didn’t have the tools to handle a confrontation with these much older women (a couple of whom were well into their 50’s), a confrontation explaining that they were in the wrong to gossip.  How did a person approach such a topic?

My solution was to leave the office over the lunch hour and walk the street.  I was in the unfortunate location of having no shops or malls anywhere nearby to browse in so I simply walked along the sidewalk as a form of escape rather than exercise.  It still left me a victim during the coffee breaks though and within 4 months I resigned.  Since then I have learned to keep my distance from those types of personal conversations and in general avoid rumour mills.  But once in a while we can stumble upon it unawares and the reaction is the same, gut wrenching anxiety and upset.

For some, rumour mills are the spice of life, they seem to thrive on stirring up doubts in others whether they realize they are doing it or not.  But the consequences to a person’s health in living with doubts, uncertainty and anxiety can be very severe.  This winter we have seen in our city a growing level of uncertainty within our business sector and likewise we have seen an unusually high rise in absences and illnesses in the community.  The severe grey weather has not helped to make things easier so this is one person who is hoping that Mother Nature brings us an early spring.  We all desperately need that sunshine.