I was having a bit of a snooze on the
front porch today and I thought “now this is the life of Riley”. The sun was pouring in through the windows,
the orange and yellow leaves were gently falling to the earth and all was
mellow and calm. The truth is that I
have a hard time taking a nap so I lay on the sofa with eyes half closed and
just thought about . . . nothing. It was
almost like meditation, making the mind blank only I didn’t think about it, it
just happened.
With all the hustle and bustle of this
past year I realize that I am not someone who can sit quietly for very
long. I need to be doing something which
seems remarkable. When I was younger,
and especially while I was working, the thing that I liked best to do was just
sit still and do nothing. Now I find
myself moving from one thing to another like some human pendulum. It is very disconcerting to have this mobile
side of myself surface. I’ve tried to
calm myself down and tell myself to slow down (especially after that ridiculous
fall in the fish pond) but to no avail. But
this afternoon I told myself to go check out the front porch and the next thing
I knew I was lying on that sofa and just enjoying the heat of the day. Amazing.
It was more amazing to realize that I
had let my mind go blank for a few moments and just experienced a sense of
peace and wonder with little conscious thought.
Of course, the moment I realized I was doing it I snapped out of it
which was unfortunate but also amusing.
Obviously it takes time to get into true meditation mode. Last summer my sister and I tried to do a
meditation which lasted about 2 minutes before my sister got distracted and
began talking. Another few seconds and
it probably would have been me that would have broken the silence.
But quiet time is really nice . . . and
quiet.
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