Tuesday, August 6, 2013

More Pondering


Well, as I said yesterday, things to ponder.  Life is a rollercoaster and this mind questions how it moves along.  I wonder about what effort a person should put into attempting to change the world.  Are certain people fated to achieve more than others?  Do we make choices that cause us to be effectual in life, or to move in a small circle of influence?  How much of life’s direction is caused by choice or by circumstance?  I’ve spent a good chunk of time pushing to make things happen, to make changes, to create “chance” but I wonder if I had only stayed still would the same set of circumstances have occurred?
       Thinking about one’s life, about life in general, and about world events can be both soul sucking and fascinating.  Sometimes I want to take my head off my neck and let it rest and not think and yet to not question what is happening in my life and around me would be too strange and barren.  Even though I can resign myself to being only a small part of the world I cannot help but be interested in what goes on here on earth and out in the universe.  I life thinking about history and I like thinking about the future.  And yes, I like being in the Now.
       When I listen to my mother and other older people talk I find myself fascinated by their backward looking.  It recalls Scarlett’s mantra “I was right when I said I’d never look back.  It hurts too much, it drags at your heart till you can’t ever do anything else except look back.”  When you compare the apple of your youth to something out of the Garden of Eden with today’s version being nothing but a potato you know you are old.  When every paragraph, if not every sentence, starts with “back in the day” style you know you are not thinking about life today.  There’s a way of looking at history that does not emote the past.  There’s a danger in forgetting analytical thinking.
       Ah the human mind, what a tender, treacherous instrument.

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