How to be a Perfect Retiree

There’s a time to be serious and there’s a time to be ridiculous to paraphrase Ecclesiastes. 

How can I possibly tell anyone how to the perfect retiree?  What would the perfect retirement look like to you?  Indeed, what looks great for one person would be utterly boring to someone else, painful even.  However, I can still suggest that what I have already written about in the past is still an excellent template on how to strive towards what would be perfect for you.  Yes, I am back at it, the 6 pieces are essential to be worked at in order to have the closest proximity to a “perfect retirement”.  They are, once again, Financial, Physical, Health, Social, Hobbies and Spirit.

The more I have researched and the more I have observed those who have retired the more strongly I can vouch that all 6 pieces need to be looked at, thought about and created into a pattern for your life in order for you to have the fullest satisfaction of that life in retirement.  I notice it most particularly in men, how unhappy they are in retirement because they don’t have Spirit or Social or Hobbies and in many cases, all 3 pieces are missing.  What is the point of saving a huge amount of money to still be dissatisfied when you quit the job you may or may not have enjoyed for the last 40 years?  What is the point of being physically fit or super healthy if you don’t find life exciting, interesting and fun?

If I may reiterate, so much of what we can benefit from is actually free.  Is there anyone who cannot access a park to walk in?  Is there anyone who doesn’t have a computer or at least access to one?  Does anyone not have access to a library?  Is anyone barred from a religious community?  I feel confident in saying that no one is barred from any of these things.

Naturally I must agree that if one hasn’t been able to save for a retirement and is dependent solely on what they would receive from CPP and Old Age Security you are going to have some struggles, especially if you either have a mortgage or are renting.  This is, indeed a problem, and one that I have not easy answer or solution for without going down the political gopher hole.  However, even for those struggling with financial concerns in their old age, there is still no excuse for not taking advantage of things that are free and may help you feel somewhat better despite your struggles.

I end as I began, there’s a time to be sad and there’s a time to rejoice.  Just saying . . .

Approaching the Second Anniversary

It is more than believable to me that I am approaching my second anniversary of retirement not because it has been long or dull but because I have in fact been thinking over the two very different years I have experienced.  The first year was filled with projects, new revelations and travels while the second year was spent in a quieter way that for some time had me feeling concerned.  But by January I had found my bearings and plowed ahead on a more thoughtful and goal oriented path, thanks in great part to John Maxwell’s book on jumpstarting my thinking.

It may seem very peculiar for people contemplating retirement to hear me speak of goals.  After all, aren’t we done with all that sort of thing once we quit working?  Aren’t we supposed to just have fun?  The answers are no to the first question and yes, of course, to the second.  The reason I say no to the first question is that in order to feel fulfilled after working one should really have some goals even if it is simply based around having fun.  The danger of not setting any goals is that one will simply do a few rounds of this and that and gradually sink into the coach in front of the television or computer and vegetate.  That is neither fun nor geared towards having a satisfying retirement.

Do you need a satisfying retirement?  Well, yes, I think so because what is the point of even being alive if you aren’t satisfied with life?  At a minimum it behooves one to look at the six pieces of the retirement pie (Physical, Mental, Spiritual, Social, Financial and Activity) and set minimal goals which should be assessed annually (although semi-annually is even better).  If you loath physical activity the first goal you can set yourself is “getting out of bed”, tick.  If you can’t stand to read a book, set a goal like “listen to 10 minutes of hard core news”, tick.  Not spiritual?  Set yourself to sit quiet for 5 minutes and build up to 15 – just quiet time (no noise, no self talk, just space), tick.  Social, if you hate people, get a dog, tick.  Financial, I won’t even go there.  Activity, if you can’t find an activity give yourself a mental reminder that you are most likely comatose.

Sarcasm aside, if you are reading this blog the chances are that you have some interest in having a meaningful retirement (or at the very least have a good sense of humour).  As I have said many times before we are blessed to be living in a time when we have the opportunity to retire at an age where we still have many years of post-work to evolve into who we were meant to be.  There are many ways we can enjoy the 6 pieces of pie free of charge and we should grab at these opportunities with gleeful hands.

I ask you, are you with me?

New Information on Retirement

This morning I caught a headline about a new book on retirement specifically for men, called “Ready for Retirement” by Lyndsey Green.  I haven’t read the book so cannot comment on the content but since there are few books on the subject it may be worthwhile to pick this one up.  In the article she mentioned that many couples do not discuss their retirement dreams and so they end up having very different ideas about what they will do during their retirement years.  It is so ironic that we live in an age of communication with every possible device to communicate but old fashioned talking seems to be “out”.

I’ve included 2 links, one Canadian and one American with some useful information that should cheer you up on the numbers game.  Beyond financial information there is a really scarcity on the other 5 aspects of the retirement pie (Financial, Physical, Social, Spiritual, Mental and Activities) other than broad suggestions on looking at these areas.

With respect to physical and mental activity I think I will leave it simply with common sense suggestion to check in with your doctor before engaging in strenuous exercise; beyond that physical activity is a must at least 5 days a week for at least 30 minutes.  Simply walking is good enough but when you are retired you have enough time that you can incorporate several sessions of exercise within the day.  For example you could walk 30 minutes both morning and evening as well as include 30 minutes of yoga, Pilates or swimming.  All are very low cost activities.  With regard to mental activity, reading and crossword puzzles are cheap and easy although they are rather passive and will not necessarily stimulate your mind as much as learning something new.  So if you enjoy reading and courses are not for you the next best thing is to read to study something new.

I’ve also written in the past about the spiritual piece of the pie.  Spirituality can mean your participation in your religion but if you are not religious you still need to address your inner peace of mind, if you will.  Anywhere from beginners using 10 minutes of solitude to do a “check in” which can expand to a genuine meditation that can start with 10 minutes and grow up to 60 or 90 minutes, depending on how much you enjoy it and the time you have to “spare”. 

More importantly I would like to discuss Social and Activities today.

I have noticed, just as the article below mentions, that I am frequently alone because my peers are still working.  I have made a determined effort to stay social not just via social media but by picking up the phone and talking to friends as well as making social commitments regularly.  By regularly I mean a minimum of once every two weeks but frequently it is weekly.  But wait, I will not go “check” of the checklist quite so easily.  There came a time when I realize that I am doing 100% of the running in the social schedule and I found myself getting a little depressed.  Happily I have found a solution out of that mini crisis by discovering a little book at Costco called “Jumpstart Improving Your Mind” for a mere $6.99.  It’s a 90 day series of articles and exercises to encourage a positive mindset which focuses on removing negative feelings.  I highly recommend it.

Volunteering combines both social stimuli as well as keeping active.  There is a wide range of volunteer positions available so I won’t talk too much about that.  Many activities can include your physical activity such as golfing, hiking, skiing and so forth.  There are all kinds of clubs available from camera clubs to target shooting so it’s simply a matter of searching out the one that interests you most.  You are only limited by your own imagination and perhaps your physical limitations.

But take heed, start planning sooner rather than later, particularly if you are in a relationship.  It is very important to have similar goals and interests or at least a strategy to keep out of each other’s hair so your relationship will survive so much togetherness!  Happy planning, folks!

http://www.moneysense.ca/retire/10-things-they-wont-tell-you-about-retirement/ 

http://money.usnews.com/money/retirement/articles/2015/02/17/10-surprising-facts-about-retirement

 

Fast Track to Garden Path

When I retired 16 months ago I hit the ground running with courses and building projects that took me through most of the first year.  I was able to keep up a tempo similar to that of my working life so my adjustment period was almost nil.  Now in my second year I will admit that I am struggling somewhat with a slower tempo particularly because it is winter so that it is difficult to labour in the grounds.  I find myself experiencing a certain sense of guilt because I am not “working”.  Reading with a pretense at studying, making a few crafts or researching online do not feel like true work.

Let me step back a little and recall what the pre-retirement facilitator mentioned to me about time.  He said that in retirement one should look back on the year, month or week with a feeling like “wow, that was great” rather than “how time has flown” and that idea really resonated with me.  I can truly say that the first year was indeed lived with that wow-factor.  I suppose one should be realistic and know that it cannot always be so hectic and so productive but slowing to a snail pace is very difficult for someone who has lived a very fast paced life, due in great part to my long commute over these past 15 years.

I am confessing to the fact that this retirement guru is still coming to grips with new factors in the next phase of her life but even as today we hit what they call “Blue Monday” I feel more optimistic than I have in a while.  Stopping to smell the roses daily will soon be the new normal and I am sure I will come to relish it just as much as living in the fast lane, in fact I will probably love it a great deal more!

A Slanting Look

I’m looking out of my office window and can see from the slant in the shadows that winter is approaching and that gives me a little pang.  Goodbye to hours in the garden and basking in sunlight and hello to snuggling in front of a cozy fire. 

That sounds marvelous but the reality is that in order to stay sane I find myself needing some self-imposed structure to my day.  This includes a regular morning wakeup time, breakfast while reading my latest book and then at least 40 minutes of exercise to get me revved up for the day.  By 8 o’clock I am now ready to really start my day, first with my chicken chores and then into the office to read my mail, pay my bills and then start writing for an hour or two.  Actually snuggling by the fire doesn’t happen until later in the afternoon.

Yesterday I wrote an article which I have since scrapped because it again preached about regularity and finding hobbies but once I evaluated it I felt nauseated.  Who am I to advise anyone on how their retirement should look?  I’m still learning how to manage my own retirement and every day I am discovering new things about myself.  One of the things I have realized is that learning is one of the most valuable experiences we can have.  Learning as experience.

There’s learning about one’s self, an evaluation of our reactions, our morals and values and how we live and learn.  There is also learning about subjects whether that is a specific topic such as history or physics or abstract ideas and philosophies or a craft or hobby.  Our little grey cells need a daily workout and even a simple ah ha moment such as learning about the uses of lavender is meaningful. 

Learning, evaluating, experience. Ahh.

The Rest of My Life

I look back on the last 12 months and think “how awesome” which is exactly what my coach had said my reaction should be, rather than “how time flies”.  I look into the future and can only see more of the same, a time of activity, fun and fulfillment.  That’s how everyone’s retirement should feel, happiness and fulfillment all rolled into one satisfying emotion. 

What made these months so special?  Every day felt as though I had something to accomplish when I woke up.  It’s deeply satisfying to work all day at something and go to bed at night tired but with a sense of accomplishment all the time knowing that another day will be filled with the same satisfaction.  Maybe some folks have this feeling when they go to their regular job but it was never like that for me; if you do, you are very lucky indeed.

Now don’t get me wrong, not every day was one where I was building something.  Some days I would work on my writing, other days I would be shopping with my mother or going to the hairdresser for a new look and sometimes I simply took a rest from hammering and gophering to just socialize with friends or family.  Remarkably I never felt that I was goofing off or that I should feel guilty if I wasn’t going at top speed.  I spent about 3 days in bed or lying on the sofa in the early stages with my broken wrist but other than that I didn’t even have a day of loafing in bed.  Every day I felt rested and ready for the next thing on the list.  Every day I spent time outdoors even if it was only to watch the hens frolic in the yard.

I was fortunate that we had an amazing autumn, a mild winter, an early and lovely spring and a terrific summer.  I certainly had a bad time of it with the broken wrist but even that turned out to be pretty tame compared to what it might have been.  Somehow I managed to get things done with the cast on, even typing one handed!

There’s a lot to be said for having a plan laid out and more to be said for being flexible as things come on sale, weather changes to alter the staging of construction and basically keeping one step ahead of The List!  What I have learned about myself this year is that I am simply not the type of person to get bored, that I can always find something to do, something to learn and most of all, I can always, always wake up with a smile on my face.

Call me Pollyanna, but this life isn’t half bad!

On the Right Path

I am rapidly approaching the anniversary of my first year in retirement and find myself assessing the year to date.  As I wrote six months into retirement I still feel that the time has not flown by without at the same time feeling a strong sense of accomplishment as in “wow, this has been great”.  For the first time in my life I feel that I have had short and long term goals and that the short term goals have been accomplished in fine fashion.  The long term goals have good foundations and I am set to take them into motion this winter.

So what has the first year in retirement taught me?  Hmm, first of all to slow down.  I stopped working on September 30^th and the following day I jumped headlong into retirement by taking a course, starting my workout regime and began working on the first of several building projects in the months ahead.  The consequence of working too hard and too fast was that I became sloppy and caused myself a serious injury in breaking my wrist.  It was a major setback but it also sobered me up to assess how I walk around the yard and in the house.  After all “I’m not getting any younger”.  Oh yes, this phrase has been knocking around in my head ever since that dismal slip into the fish pond.  Just saying that makes me feel silly!

Aside from this sobering experience everything else has been delightful.  I feel thrilled to say that my association with my former colleagues is as strong as ever and I credit them as much as myself with keeping up the connection.  Social contact is vital for a person’s wellbeing and those who go into retirement often lose many of their former associates in quick order.  Ever since my father’s passing I have made an especially strong effort to build good relationships with a variety of different people and I feel so lucky to have met them in the first place.  Keeping in touch takes quite a lot of effort and I am learning to be more hands on by telephoning instead of just sending emails or Facebooking.  Talking to someone is really a human connection that emails just cannot duplicate. 

My hobbies took a bit of a backseat this year due to all the building projects but as the projects were made to help implement the hobbies it really was essential.  So this year, the craft room is finished and ready to help me create some wonderful cards, scrapbooks, drawings and other things as they come to mind.  The greenhouse has been in use all summer and the raised beds have had their first trial run.  The back yard is tilled and ready for a bumper crop next year.  I have several other things on the back burner for long term fulfilment.

Exercise took front and centre from the beginning and I can report that despite a short hiatus while I was convalescing I have been faithfully working out 5 days a week.  As the anniversary draws near it will be time to ramp it up to the next level and that plan is already in motion.  All is satisfying on this front, with more energy and more limberness in this old rack of bones.

On a “spiritual” or mental level I feel less satisfied.  I have fallen short in keeping up with the free meditations that are offered by Oprah and Deepak regularly but during the last round I managed to actually get voice activated messages which I really enjoyed but did not sit still long enough to listen to all 21 of them.  I’ve promised myself to slow down this autumn and complete the full course when it’s offered again.  When I was listening I did feel that I was being centred, as they call it in meditation. 

What I have learned this first year is quite simply to slow down and savour every moment of my life.  Without wanting to sound preachy, don’t wait for retirement to take a page out of that book and so ENJOY YOUR LIFE TO THE FULLEST.

Practical Steps

While the days are particularly hot I have been studying via the Internet on my hobby of gardening.  What a fantastic tool at one’s fingertips.

How to grow asparagus, when to water a bougainvillea, should a fuchsia be in the shade or have plenty of sunlight? What plants attract butterflies and which plants should go next to each other?  I have realized that my memorization skills are not what they used to be and I am not completely sure why that is.

Fortunately we have “Favorites” available on the computer although I have not mastered the skill of organizing them in a proper filing system (is there a way?).  Occasionally if I know that I will definitely reference the information more than once in the season I will print the information off and put it in my notebook so it’s handy (then I just have to find the notebook).  Yes, it’s very true, in retirement a person quickly loses some of the skills that were her bread and butter in her working days.  This may be due in great part to too many projects happening one after the other so a girl cannot look about her without finding a pile of paper everywhere.  What happened to the “handle every paper only once” philosophy so handy during the working day?  I really cannot say.

So my friends, I have no words of advice on how to stay organized.  If anyone has that nailed down, do let me know.

Space, Lovely Space

Living in the country one may get used to wide open spaces and take freedom for granted.  But it is surprising how space can be confining when what was plenty for one becomes crowded when even the quietest “two” intrudes on their space.

I can understand why marriages becomes strained when one or other of the spouses retires and is suddenly home 24/7.  The person who had already been staying home is now being monitored, judged, questioned, or simply harassed by the new person who finds themselves at a loose end.  I reiterate what I have said before in this blog, it is essential that both husbands and wives have plenty of hobbies, interests and events to occupy themselves in retirement.  If you have someone at your shoulder for every minute of the day it can get very wearing in no time at all.  If you are not used to holding someone’s hand, in giving undivided attention to someone for every waking minute you are going to have a falling-out in record time.

So ladies and gentlemen, get your notebooks out and start writing down a list of things that you have dreamed of doing, things you enjoyed doing when you were a child, a teenager, and a young person.  Dancing, music, reading, playing sports, researching history, butterflies, bird watching, drawing cartoons, designing clothes, paper dolls, creating new automobile designs, taking apart bicycles, engines, motors, building model airplanes, doll houses, bird houses, quilting, embroidery, knitting, crocheting, scrapbooking, genealogy, volunteering at a soup kitchen, a school, etc. 

You need to take a seriously look at what you enjoy doing, you need to take care of your health in order to be able to keep up with your interests and activities, and for gosh sakes, you need to cut your partner some slack so you don’t end up quarreling with each other.

And always remember, you need to ensure that you have the financial ability to retire and keep up with your interests so it’s important to look at the things within your price range.  Many things are essentially free to do, or can be done on a limited budget.

Retirement Slowdown

The month of May was a tremendous spring, warm and sunny after 5 years of non-spring.  One morning in early May I was inspired to clean out the dregs in my infamous pond and shortly afterwards my feet flew out from under me and I went crashing down, throwing arms out to break the fall.  Instead I broke my left wrist and have spent the month of May bemoaning the momentum of my projects as well as enjoyment of spring.

In the time that I have not spent feeling sorry for myself I have thought about how very tough people have it who have no hope of recovering the use of their limbs.  I only am out of commission for 8 weeks and while it is frustrating I ought to be counting my blessings.  At the same time I definitely find myself realizing that my level of patience for myself is next to zero.  I had no idea that I am not given to cutting slack for myself.  I find myself wanting to do the same ordinary things “as usual”.  But I cannot tie my shoes, floss my teeth or tighten up my bed sheets.  How many times do I want to fly off the handle?  A dozen times a day.  I have to apologize to my mother every night for being short with her, simply because I cannot do things for myself and she isn’t doing it fast enough for me. 

Who is this monster?  It’s horrible.

My family and friends tell me this is a sign that I ought to slow down.  That irritates me because I am not going fast enough!  But over the last few weeks, when they say slow down, I breathe deeply and finally it has come to me.  It’s not a question of slowing down, it’s a matter of being humble.  The truth is that I have been too cocky in my retirement without realizing it.  It’s time to re-evaluate my priorities and smell a few roses (or stink weed) in order to get my head on straight.  After all, I am not a spring chicken!

Six Month Anniversary

It’s April 1^st but this is one person who is not a fool today as she celebrates her 6 month anniversary as a retiree.  As my “retirement coach” suggested, a person should look back on their time and say “wow, what a great ride” rather than “how time flies”.  I am happy to report that the first is what I am thinking about the first 6 months and I am looking forward to more of the same over the spring and summer months.

Looking at the 6 sections of the Retirement Pie (Physical, Mental, Social, Financial, Spiritual & Activity) I would say that I have concentrated on 4 pieces to date.  I have stayed steady on a one hour exercise program, I have practiced frugality (after a well-planned financial program that I have been working with my adviser on) and I have nailed down my social life almost by accident.  Delivering my eggs to my former colleagues once a week has also served as lunch and coffee dates that keep me well connected.  As well, it is fortunate that in this age of electronics we have the use of Facebook and email to stay in touch with so many people who lead busy lives.  As for activity, it seems like there aren’t enough hours in the day to do everything that I want to do but there’s always tomorrow.  And I haven’t even got to the “leisure” part of retirement yet!  And Mom thought I would be bored.

As for the Spiritual and Mental pieces, I seem to be lagging a little in these departments but hey, it’s only the first 6 months!  To some extent I have been learning since I have been reading a lot on sustainable farming, beekeeping and gardening in general.  My book club is back to reading some good books and of course my usual reading never falters.  But as for my Spanish lessons, no comprendre.  The books are on hand for easy access but “I have not time” keeps cropping up.

So what can I say about retirement besides “it is highly recommended”?  Succinctly, get yourself together.  At the top of the list be sure you are financially ready for the jump because if you don’t know how to rein in your spending habits you will quickly get yourself into trouble.  Second, it is vital that you have yourself psychologically ready to take the jump.  Third, you need to be sure that you have enough things in your life to keep you busy and these should be things that you truly enjoy.  Not the honey do jar type of things but things you just love to do.  If you have always planned on making a shop in your garage because you want to do more carpentering, then great.  If you want to clean out the garage, to clean out the garage, well, not so great because that is a very limited task.  What I have found is that one project has led to others along the same line which is to get my hobbies running efficiently for me, those hobbies being arts & craft and gardening / farming.

The more a read up on retirement the more I realize that there are a whole lot of things that a person can interest themselves in.  One can take a scholarly route into studying up on a subject and even become an expert on it, perhaps writing a thesis or book.  One can find all kinds of sports to partake in and some or very inexpensive.  For example hiking and cross country skiing are pretty cheap activities.  While doing those activities one could also enjoy photography (which can be a bit more expensive if you really get into fancy cameras) or socializing. 

Meditating is something that costs nothing but your own concentration but this is an area that I must confess to being slow to get deeply in to though it is a definite goal for me.  Most people today are not church goers but attending church is inexpensive and you have opportunities to get involved both socially and charitably with these organizations.  If you are not faith oriented then meditation is a great alternative to getting in touch with the spiritual side of your being.  Now that may seem very hokey but the facts show that all 6 pieces of the Retirement Pie are essential for a well-rounded, fulfilling life.

One last word, the greatest compliment I have received is the comment that I am the poster child for what retirement should look like. 

(please don’t hate me).

An Authentic Retiree

 

Quite a few years ago I read “Simple Abundance” by Sarah Ban Breathnach with joy and wonder.  A great many of her ideas found their way into my repertoire of being including her Gratitude Journal.  One of the most pleasurable parts of her book though was her excavation of quotations, thoughts and ideas from authors of gone by days.  Sarah did all the ground work for those who enjoy discovering older authors and their works and through her I have discovered a number of writers that I had never heard of before but also ones that I had known “in passing” but never bothered to pursue.  All that changed after reading Simple Abundance.  I was on a mission and it has been a rewarding one.

Yesterday I pulled her books off the shelf again since I wanted to refresh myself for the year ahead and also to find some inspiration with my writing.  Lo and behold, on the other side of retirement I find myself a different woman.  Did I not notice in my past readings (yes, I’ve read the book several times) how terribly needy Sarah was, that under her surface she seemed to lack self-confidence and that a lot of the work she had us doing was driven by her own needs?  Of course I did, but while I was a working woman I was also needy and lacking in self-confidence.  I had a light bulb moment this morning as I continued my reading and that was simply “I don’t care anymore about what people think, about what I need to pursue, I am free, free, free”.  What an amazing treasure, to discover that once we are not dependent on making a living, when we are Retired we come into our own!

I continue to read Simple Abundance, and I continue to appreciate everything Sarah writes and I want to assure my readers that the work I did through this book did indeed help me become a more balanced, calm and carrying person.  But today I learned that once a person steps over the threshold into retirement one gains a new perspective on many things, from material things, the drama of work and most of all rediscovering one’s authentic self.

And isn’t that just too cool for words?

(PICTURES BY ELIZABETH SHIPPEN GREEN)

Contemplation

I’ve been thinking a lot about how I got to this stage of my life, Early Retirement and still have no real answer.  It’s as though one day I just thought ‘carpe diem’ and went ahead and did it.

I’ve certainly been planning and preparing for this time of my life for a considerable length of time, a good 8 or 9 years I believe.  I am aghast when I hear of people who retire even later without any plan.  A friend of mine mentioned a chance encounter with a 71 year old gentleman who had recently retired, without a plan and persisted in asking her (a philosophy student) “what is the meaning of life”?  What an incredibly naive question to come from someone at that stage of their life!  Even if my friend had an answer, that answer would only be valid for herself, not for anyone else. 

After our conversation I thought about this gentleman and all the other people who go through life thinking retirement will give them all their dreams, almost as though it were a pill that constant dieters wish for, that “instant gratification”.  Well folks, I am here to tell you that there is no magic bullet that comes to you sudden like at age 65.  Recalling Barbara Walters’ summation on her special about Living to 100, she felt that what all her subjects had in common was a joy of living.  Perhaps for some that is “too cheerful” so I will modify my thought into saying that what makes life interesting is just that, finding that there is something interesting in the world every day.  That could be meeting someone new who has interesting conversation, it could be a terrific new book, it could be an experience you’ve been wanting to do all your life but either didn’t have the time, means or opportunity to test.  The worst thing a person can do for themselves is to sit in a rocking chair and let life pass them by, figuratively and literally.

Not everyone may have satisfaction in a structured day, week or year but one should have a purpose in getting up in the morning.  Last night I was thinking about my mother’s generation of housewives, women who married, raised children and kept house.  They didn’t have any sort of a retirement plan; they just continued doing what they had always done, well past the age of 65.  Then I got to thinking about my generation which is perhaps the first generation of women who almost universally left high school to either go to college or go directly to work, with the thought of working after marriage and after children.  We are the first complete generation of women who have worked for over 40 years and are now entering retirement age and there is not a lot of information about “how to do it”.

I am still studying and thinking about retirement for women and have not made any conclusions but I have a feeling that the format being used for men is not really the right format for women.  Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, remember?

 

Retirement Quizzes

I have now taken so many quizzes and tests on retirement that I am exhausted but one thing I know for sure when I say I am ready for retirement I mean it one hundred percent.  All the tests prove that I am not willing to go back to work, I am reluctant to volunteer and I basically would like to just do what I want to do.  No surprises.

I’ve almost finished a month in retirement and looking back on these weeks I can say I have been supremely happy.  I feel very satisfied with what I have been doing these weeks, there is a sense of accomplishment there without any feelings of simply killing time.  I noticed a number of the questions on the various quizzes asked questions about how time would be spent in retirement, phrasing around lazing about or killing time.  I could tell these were loaded questions that would not be good to answer yes to but I honestly could say that this is not what I would be doing or feeling.

So far there has been a sense of purpose in the tasks performed but at the same time in the back of my mind there was anticipation for what was to come once the autumn tasks were completed.  I sincerely hope that the anticipation for what is next will be well worth the wait.  And as I work away I am busily thinking out themes.

The best is yet to be

Disconnected

Let me just say that losing one’s computer for a week can cause a personality crisis, a social meltdown or some other unexplainable malady.  Normally I would not have been in such dire straits when this happened a week ago but once a person is retired her whole social network is based on communication which in turn is mainly computer based (i.e. emails, Facebook, blogging).  The crisis has been handled by the purchase of a brand new computer when another mini-crisis occurred – getting it set up.  Miraculously I managed to do it all by myself, even the Outlook email functions.  Mind you, right now I am a little suspicious in that I have not received any emails, although I have been able to send out.  Usually in the mornings I have several from Facebook at least.

Today I am at the end of my third week in retirement and I am happy to be able to say that each week has ended with a “wow” rather than the “boy time flies” attitude.  Many people will say that they are busier than ever in retirement which I am finding true with me.  I had my first one-on-one coaching session with the retirement coach last week and something he told me really shocked me.  As much as I have researched retirement I had not come across this statistic.  In one particular company pre-retirement seminars were offered for many years and after some time surveys were conducted.  Those who retired at age 65 but had never chosen to take any of the seminars were dead in (guess) – 3 months!  I had expected the answer to be 1 to 3 years so you can imagine I almost fell off my chair when he said months!

Planning retirement is much more than looking after the financial side of things, although that is important.  I like to call it the holistic side of retirement where you plan how you are going to stay mentally and physically activity with exercise, family and social activities.  You also need to plan for some sort of spiritual time whether that be religious, meditation or just personal “me” time.  Most important of all you need to have enough interests and hobbies to dispose of the extra 8 to 10 hours a day that were previously used for “work”.  Golfing simply does not cut it for those who live in Canada (or elsewhere for that matter).  Volunteering may be a good way to dispose of some of the time but I recommend that you do not get swallowed up with so much volunteering that it becomes your new job. 

My coach hasn’t come right out and said it but I think I am his star pupil . . . . and I haven’t come right out and said it (to him) but I think I could do his job.  Am I calling myself an expert?  After studying retirement of more than 8 years I am thinking, maybe.  J

Glorious Autumn

When you get a true autumn, when the weather stays above zero and the leaves stay on the trees long enough to change to yellow, orange, red and brown, the one temptation that indicates a youthful has got to be the impulse to jump in a pile, drop down and roll in the leaves.  I had to laugh when I dumped two giant piles of leaves into the chicken run and as soon as I shut the gate the Henriettas were hopping on top and rustling their way down through the pile.  Just like little kids.

I’ve always found that with the arrival of autumn there is a new energy in the air partly from the tradition of going back to school but certainly just because of the crispness of the season.  It’s therefore fitting that I am starting this new chapter of my life in the autumn since it immediately puts me in schoolgirl mode.  I’m eagerly poring over the ”Planning Your Comfort Zones: Retirement Planning” book that was provided to me by my coach.  Most of the material is quite familiar to me which reassures me that everything I have learned and planned up to this point has been on the money.  

At this point I would like to encourage all my male readers to really look at their lives, their hobbies and interests as well as their social circle because you are the ones who will be hit the hardest in retirement if you are not properly prepared for what will come.  I’ve noticed that most men will likely only have one real friend but many associates most of whom will fall away from your circle once you are retired.  Women generally have a wider circle of friends and seem to be better at keeping associations going after they leave their place of work.  Women also typically do not define themselves by their work while most men will.  There are a lot of websites and books to help everyone find a niche if they are really interested in having a quality retirement.

I’m really happy to be enjoying an Indian Summer as I enter my own “Indian Summer”.  What a different mood would have had if I had done this in dead of winter.  When you are planning your exit you may want to take seasonal timing into account, something which I had not done but turned out fortuitously.