Good Bones, a poem

Coincidentally the PBS program “Story in the Public Square” last Saturday did an interview with Maggie Smith, the poet whose most famous poem is “Good Bones”. It was published three days after the Orlando shooting and the poem was shared on Facebook and Twitter in response. Ms. Smith said that every time there is a tragedy the poem goes viral again. How very strange that only a few hours after watching this interview 2 more mass shootings occurred in America and one can assume that the poem is again being shared even as I am now doing.

I had never heard of MotionPoems before but here is a link to this one. It will make you appreciate the poem so much more, particularly if you are not given to poetry reading usually.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P6tokL583A8

Good Bones  By Maggie Smith

Life is short, though I keep this from my children.

Life is short, and I’ve shortened mine

in a thousand delicious, ill-advised ways,

a thousand deliciously ill-advised ways

I’ll keep from my children. The world is at least

fifty percent terrible, and that’s a conservative

estimate, though I keep this from my children.

For every bird there is a stone thrown at a bird.

For every loved child, a child broken, bagged,

sunk in a lake. Life is short and the world

is at least half terrible, and for every kind

stranger, there is one who would break you,

though I keep this from my children. I am trying

to sell them the world. Any decent realtor,

walking you through a real shithole, chirps on

about good bones: This place could be beautiful,

right? You could make this place beautiful.

 

 

 

 

Agnotology

Agnotology is the study of culturally induced ignorance or doubt, particularly the publication of inaccurate or misleading scientific data.

I thought I would use this title for my subject rather than one that would cause too much angst in the initial viewing. The subject is capital punishment and how it is used by Americans in answer to this weekend’s mass shootings in Dayton and El Paso. I could use words such as moronic, ignorant, and capitalistic or a string of other negative words to describe some of the emotions I feel every time I hear about another tragedy in America but what does that do?

The truth is that the bottom line of what I feel is complete and utter bafflement that the American people are more enamoured of their “God given right to own guns” than of the logic in NOT owning guns, period. What is the use of bewailing the shootings and holding candlelight vigils AFTER THE FACT? What is the point of talking about capital punishment AFTER THE FACT?

Many people, many times, have spoken about what ought to be done but as I have said before “you can’t fix stupid”. One can point out the action of New Zealand immediately after their first and only mass killing (passing a law banning the sale of assault rifles). One can point to Europe’s stance on gun ownership but does any of that make a dent in the collective heads of Americans? Apparently not.

I am sorry America but I am not mourning with you. I am berating you for being so damn ignorant.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Agnotology

Reflections on Wisdom

In this past week we have heard a lot of reactionary views on the tragedy that happened in Paris on November 13^th.  People are upset and in the heat of the moment they lash out with first impulses.  But after that initial burst of vengeful or retaliatory feelings we should cool down and think about who we really are.

I cannot speak for other people but I can say that I have spent this week thinking a great deal, listening to so much on media until I got a little overwhelmed so I shut out the noise and started listening to myself.  I think this is the lesson that I learned; turn off the news rather than be drawn into it so I don’t hear the same things or see the same pictures over and over again until I am whipped into a frenzy of violent emotion.  I need distance so I can hear my own thoughts and understand where my values really lie.

At the end of the day I feel like I want to be a good, compassionate person and that means I cannot shut the door in someone’s face.  This week in both my theological reading and my meditation I was moved to do some additional reflection on God.  I was walking on the treadmill and trying to come to grips with the idea of God as a Being.  As part of the meditation we are working on 4 core beliefs – I am loving & loved, I am worthy, I am safe & trusting, I am whole & fulfilled.  So far so good, I can understand these beliefs and agree with them.  From there I thought “the vast majority of people are good people, they want these same core beliefs to be the reality of their lives”.  Again, so far so good.  Now here is something I cannot explain but for as long as I can remember my strongest belief is that good will always, ALWAYS, triumph over evil.  I may not have one hundred percent belief in God but I do have one hundred percent belief in Goodness.

So if this is true, and I believe it is, then most people are good.  So why should I be afraid of them?  The greatest wisdom of the world errs on the side of goodness, fairness, compassion and peace.  I’m on the side of that wisdom.

 

1.     

What's on the Horizon

The whole world knows that for the last week Southern Alberta has been in a State of Emergency due to an unprecedented amount of rain in the mountains which caused the snow to melt overnight and go rushing through all our rivers, creeks and streams.  So many towns were hit that for the first couple of days we were all simply stunned silent in front of our television sets.  Just when we had given a sigh of relief that Alberta was going to be spared the disasters that had happened around the world, almost near the end of our “rainy season” we had not once heard “danger of flooding”.  Then suddenly there we were in the midst of the biggest flooding that we had ever seen. 

       I have lived through a number of floods to the point where I used to joke “just call me Noah”.  In 2005 I was particularly badly hit when I had more than a foot of water in my basement for over a month.  I got to the point where I just had to turn my mind off and not even go down in the basement because I simply could not cope.  There was no use in trying to suck the water out because the ground was so saturated that it just kept coming in through my septic tank.  It was a nightmare.  When I look at the pictures on television and then drove by High River (which is the town next to my own) and saw just how deep the waters were, all I can say is “there are no words”.  These are not the scenes associated with Canada, much less Alberta.  To see Calgary flooded throughout the downtown core, well, as I say, it is mind numbing.

       Just when we think that everything is going our way, Mother Nature, the Universe, God, the Fates, will somehow come along and slap one upside the head.  One can never be utterly complaisant nor can we be perfectly prepared for anything that may come along, because what comes along is always a surprise. The old age “prepare for the worst and hope for the best” may be wiser than we think when we are young and full of vim and vigour.  Watching the activity of the cleanup in Calgary and the anxious way people line up to help is heartwarming.  In times of crisis we see two contrasting types of behaviour, we see all that is good and noble come out of certain people, and then with others we see the scheming, criminal like mind peak into action with plots of looting or benefiting from the situation.

       People are interesting creatures, one can never typecast humans into one set of characteristics.  We are almost white, through almost black, with a lot of grey tones in between making up the good and bad in human nature.  In the end, what will triumph?  It is really hard to say, but I always lean toward believing in the good.  That’s the optimist in me.

       Albertans, I salute you.

Repercussion

Most people believe in goodness, fairness and doing the right thing.  Many corporations have mission statements, corporate values and codes of ethics which endorse doing the right thing and some may even have a hotline for reporting on questionable conduct.  One could certainly expect this standard of behaviour in our church and state representatives but first and foremost one would expect this from our law enforcement officers.  Imagine my shock and dismay when a friend recently shared her brother’s story with me revealing the opposite of my expectations.

       Imagine when two police officers go to their staff sergeant to report a questionable incident they witnessed and they are told to “shut up and forget about it”.  Imagine that they do what they are told only to witness many similar incidents to the point where they feel they must once again speak up only to be told even more forcefully to “shut up, forget about it and NO ONE LIKES A RAT”.  Suddenly reporting on questionable behaviour makes you a tattletale, a rat, the lowest form of life in the police world!  Beating people in handcuffs is now more acceptable behaviour than “telling on them”.  When does reporting outrage become bad?  Does this mean that a wife cannot report her husband’s abuse because she is “telling on him”?  Does this mean that if you know your boss is taking kickbacks you cannot “rat  him out”?  Are you now between a rock and a hard place because you know what is going on so now you become part of the problem, you are silently complicit?

       While not sharing these police officers’ full story here please know that I am 100% convinced of the truth of the allegations and I am deeply shocked and saddened that this type of corruption, and yes I do call this corruption, is happening in our Canadian police force.  The story is straight out of a Law & Order episode but imagine my shock to know that it is not an isolated incident and that the staff sergeant then “leaked” the story to others and suddenly the whole police force was aware of these “rats” who were upset and alarmed that fellow police officers were beating up handcuffed perps.  Are you serious?  An upstanding law enforcement officer is supposed to shut up and accept brutality here in CANADA.  Are you crazy?  Really, can this be possible, IN CANADA?

       I have always believed that while lines may get blurred at what is a tattletale and what is responsible reporting there can be no doubt that brutality or outright criminality must be reported at the earliest possible opportunity.  It’s one thing to stay silent if you see your boss taking home a box of pens from the supply room and quite another to know he is receiving a new car because he’s awarded a contract to a supplier.  One of the reasons I do not watch the show Blue Bloods is that I cannot stand the character Danny after I saw him, a police officer, shoving a handcuffed perp’s head in a toilet to try to get information out of him.  I do not care if he is a drug dealing villain, it is not acceptable for a police officer to brutalize someone in his custody.  IT IS NOT ACCEPTABLE, I do not care, it is NOT ACCEPTABLE. 

       Has our society lost the need for clear black and white lines when it comes to law enforcement?  Are we so jaded that we say “everyone does it”?  No, everyone does NOT do it.  I absolutely cannot condone a law enforcement officer using any type of brute force on someone who is already handcuffed and in custody.  Two officers against one handcuffed person does not require kicking in the head and being punched like a punching bag by Rocky for heaven’s sake!  What is the matter with people to think you should close your eyes to this.  To know that this is happening on a regular basis and still – you do nothing to prevent it?

       And then the worst happens.  A 17 year old, unarmed boy is dead.

       A true story.

Cultural Exchange

In our country I like to think that we have more tolerance than other nations particularly to our neighbours south of us.  I notice that the younger generation is even more tolerant than the older ones but even my own age group I believe is very open to receiving foreigners into our country, our homes and so forth.  This is what I believe, but is it the truth?

       I know that in my line of work we have representatives of almost every nation in the world working with us and I have never once heard a racist or intolerant comment.  When I went to high school we didn’t have very many ethnic groups but again I must say that I never heard anyone make rude comments or jokes.  I do, however, remember in my elementary school having a commotion when 2 aboriginal boys started there.  I would have been about 12 when this happened but I heard that some parents petitioned the school to have the boys removed.  My own parents were shocked to learn that the boys were being treated badly but eventually the noise died down and they were accepted.  I also remember in this same school we had a boy from Germany start in my sister’s class.  He did not speak English at all and the children at recess treated him brutally even going so far as to “heil Hitler” him with the Nazi salute.  He had many fights and eventually he was brought into our class every morning to get some mentoring from my teacher who seemed to have a rapport with him.  I felt very sorry for him especially when I saw an almost hunted look in his eyes.  It was terrible to see.

       It’s one thing to recognize differences but it’s something else to act on feelings of hatred for no reason other than that someone is different, whether that be race, religion, belief or what have you.  I have a hard time understanding this kind of mind.  Didn’t we have a war 70 years ago that should have taught us something?

Who's at Fault

Two days apart and two teenagers are dead in separate car accidents where texting is allegedly a factor in the accidents.  Same stretch of highway, the first accident was well publicized and yet the second accident happened.  RCMP suspect both were texting while driving.

       Here’s my question.  How is it possible that parents continue to buy cell phones for their children at extremely young ages when the parents must have heard all the controversy regarding the misuse of cell phones.   I don’t think I need to go into details regarding the misuse, be it while driving or in the classroom; whether it be texting for obsessive and inconsequential things or more seriously for harassing classmates.  I cannot comprehend why it is essential for these children to have cell phones.  Think of the millions of children who went to school and was separated from their parents for all of 6 hours, quite happy to be out of contact with said parents.  What is the matter with parents that they feel they know what their children are doing because they have a cell phone.  Do you really believe that when they text you that they are at Sally’s they aren’t really at the mall or in Johnny’s bedroom?  Is it really impossible for them to telephone from the school office to tell you they are sick?  Will you get to them any faster?

       Now here’s my take.  Parents want their kids to have what the other kids have.  They want their kids to be cool.  They don’t want to listen to their nagging query “can I have, can I have . . .” so they shut them up by buying the toy.  A lethal toy.  Once again I bring up my own parents’ mantra.  “No.”  End of story.   “No.”  Once, firm, that was it.  I am pretty sure that my parents were neither gods, genies, wizards nor demons from hell.  But they had the power.  One tiny, two-letter word and it was over.  No nagging, no possibility of a do-over, re-think or harassment process.  No meant no.

       For the millionth time, I do not understand why the next generation of parents, going forward, have had such a hard time uttering this word.  I don’t know how many times I have felt irritated in a store listening to some ineffectual mother try to stop her kid from misbehaving by saying something futile like “when we get home” or “when your father hears about this”.   Who do you think you are kidding?  Certainly not the child and anyone listening knows that by the time you are half way out of the store the whole incident is forgotten.  When I was 17 I took my baby sister to Woolco warning her as we went “No bubble gum, and if you nag me I am taking you home.”  Sure enough, the little brat begged at the bubble gum machine and took a hysterical fit when I said no.  My other sister and I took her by her arms and dragged her the 4 blocks home sobbing all the way, opened up the front door, threw her into the hall and yelled to Mom “Charlotte’s home.” And then returned to the store.  From that day forward my sister was good as gold, I could take her anywhere and she was a perfect angel.  She knew I meant what I said regardless of what the inconvenient consequence was to me.  I was only 17 years old but I knew how to get control of a kid.

       It wasn’t magic.  It was knowing how to say no.

Another Hot Topic

We were watching The View yesterday where one of the hot topics was whether it was right for the media to follow the plea of the victims of the Colorado shootings.  They are asking that the media not use the shooter’s name when reporting on the story as this is precisely what the shooter wants, to be famous.  It was quite a squabble at The View desk but in my family room we were in agreement, don’t use the name.  The name is already on record and if you need to know it (but why would you) you can always check it online.  Otherwise, why publicize the name?

       The other part of the discussion was whether Hollywood, movies or television have a responsibility in the spread of violence.  I think the answer is multi-faceted.  I don’t think any movie or television show is actually going to induce any sane person, or even insane person, to go out and start shooting people.  But I do think that the ever escalating display of violence, cursing, sexuality and so on has contributed to desensitizing people to the point that we actually crave seeing the most depraved sort of violence even on the news shows.  I will never forget the moment when I first realized what I was feeling when the Jeffrey Daumer story was first breaking.  As I realized that I was actually sitting on the edge of my seating wanting to hear gory details I had a mental shock, got up and turned off the television.  I walked around the house questioning what had just happened because this was not the person I really was.  At that time, rightly or wrongly, I felt that the news media had drawn me into this sensational story and was feeding a frenzy.  To this day I am shocked at my reaction, as brief as it lasted, and am on the watch for going down that dark path again.

       This is what happened to me, which probably seems like a very tame story; but it does illustrate how easily a person can be desensitized to something awful.  Think of a century ago when women were sheltered to the point of not actually going to the cemetery to bury their loved ones.  Now we see all kinds of ghastly things on television, from poor beaten animals, to children without arms or legs lying with flies covering their faces – and those are only commercials!  Is it any wonder we are building generations of individuals with little feeling for humanity?

       We have choices, we can turn off the television and we can refuse to go the movies that are violent.  And educate our children to have the same kind of value and respect to human kind.

Tragedy in Small Town

We had a terrible shock this morning when the small town next to ours had a triple murder and suicide.  Happenings like this are rare in small towns and Claresholm has never had anything like it.  Naturally the town was all abuzz with this terrible tragedy.  I had a considerable shock when the story escalated from an “accident on the highway north of Claresholm” to “suicide and murder”.  Since I know a number of people in the community I was terribly worried until the evening news when they said the victims were not from the town.

            I always feel terrible when I hear the story of a sudden death at any time of the year but when it is close to Christmas I feel especially sad for the families.  Their lives will never be the same but to have it near a joyous holiday is particularly sad.  I have mentioned that my baby sister was born on Christmas Eve so her passing near her birthday is doubly difficult for my mother even 55 years later.  Twelve years ago my father went into the hospital on Christmas Day and passed on New Year’s Eve. 

            It takes some time to overcome the memories but eventually one has to come to grips with the tough stories.  Life is a bumpy road, long, straight strips and then some curves, some potholes, detours and who knows what will meet you along the way.  Not every day can be cheerful, sometimes we are allowed to drink the cup of sorrow, but I hope that we can also look around us and remember there are good people in our lives who can help to make the road a little easier.  Good friends and family, supportive colleagues and neighbours can all help even if it is just to listen and hold your hand and share a cup of tea with you.

            There are also natural sights to make us smile and be happy.  Just a clean dusting of snow on the lawn and the trees; the sun slanting through evergreens where the tiniest birds are feeding; rabbit prints in the snow leading into tall grass; a Christmas card from a cousin far away; the smell of baked cookies coming out of Mom’s oven; a cheery Merry Christmas on the telephone; an old ornament leaning against a picture frame . . .

            There are some sad families in the world today . . . my heart goes out to you.

Tragedy in Norway

On Friday I was walking down the hallway at work when a colleague came around the corner looking very upset. I asked him what was wrong and he told me that he had just been on the telephone with his girlfriend in Norway when the news broke that the government buildings in Oslo had exploded and there were people killed and injured all over the place. Immediate shock set in. How could something like this happen in a quiet peaceful country like Norway? Shortly afterwards we heard that a youth camp had also been attacked and 10 children were killed. What is going on? We were staggered.

I haven’t mentioned before but I work for a Norwegian based company so besides being Scandinavian myself I have an allegiance to this country from an employment perspective.

What sets people off to the extent of murdering innocent people? I cannot comprehend it.

Crime is nothing new nor is evil however one would have hoped that after all these years of education, of invention and of prosperity that things would be improving. Instead we appear to have more violence than ever before. Or am I misinformed? If one reads Charles Dickens stories there was always a lot of crime in England, even murder. How wild was the Wild West? The roaring ‘20’s saw Capone and the rise of Mafia in America. Here we are in the 21^st Century and we have world terrorists knocking down buildings and shooting innocent children. What is the matter with humanity?

We human beings are capable of so much good that it is hard to understand that there are people who have some kind of twisted brain that makes them glory in evil. I well recall a deep conversation that my father and I had some 20 years ago where we were trying to figure out the creation of things and we finally ended up with “but where does evil come from”? Somehow it became part of the equation. We couldn’t really come up with a solution. Later that evening who should knock on my door but a couple of Jehovah’s Witnesses with a magazine that asked “Where does evil come from?” Serendipity.

When I was 16 I concluded that there was no such thing as The Devil. 25 years later I was being led down a path that espoused the belief that there indeed was a devil. Something had to explain the existence of evil, but what was it? No, I don’t believe it is The Devil. Is it in all human beings, the potential for evil, or is it only in certain ones?

I don’t have the answer. But we see for ourselves that most of us lead a rather simple life doing no harm and then these madmen appear to disrupt everyone’s lives. We truly are a disappointing species.