Summing up 2011

I thought I did a pretty good job last year of summing up the year month by month so let’s take a shot at 2011.    

• 
  JANUARY saw me off to South America via Abbotsford, Seattle, Dallas, Miami and bingo we land in Quito, Ecuador where I discover that even the folks at the airport do not speak English. 
• FEBRUARY saw my return from 5 weeks in Ecuador.  Back to a brutal winter that went on and on!
• MARCH.  My great nephew Stanley arrives with much fanfare.  I also began my pre-retirement planning by using a financial consultant and a psychologist.  As well I started The ABCs of Canadian Politics blog leading up to the June election.
• APRIL saw me in Canmore for my first Writers’ Retreat where I made a commitment to continue writing regularly.  April also found me reenacting my role as Noah as the fields got saturated with melting snow and then the septic tank overflowed (again).  April also found me with my own parking space at work and I started car pooling with a colleague.
• MAY saw me first in Winnipeg for my high school’s 50^th anniversary and my own class’s  40^th Reunion.  Then it was on to Salmon Arm for the annual Girls Weekend with my FF friends.
• JUNE I found myself in San Francisco with a wonderful friend where we enjoyed site seeing, good food and shopping, shopping, shopping.  What a wonderful city to visit.
• JULY saw me recovering from the ghastly floods of the last 3 months.  This was the start of a summer where I could enjoy my home and not think about Renovations!

• AUGUST found my blog output at a high quality level.  I still admire what I wrote (did I say that out loud?) in this month.
• SEPTEMBER  I started Zumba classes.  I said goodbye to All My Children.  I started the 15 day Writing Challenge.
• OCTOBER  I found my way back to Canmore to enjoy my second Writers’ Retreat, this time with my friend Jane.  I received much positive feedback on my writing and am encouraged to continue with the anecdotal style.  I also started my Weight-To-Go diet and successfully lost 17 lbs (which are still off).
• NOVEMBER I break my vow of not attending a Company Christmas party and enjoy myself immensely.  The fun of staying overnight in a hotel didn’t hurt the experience any.  Oh yes, commit myself to another trip to NYC – gosh I do love that city!  Huge positive response to my stories about immigrating to Canada.
• 
  DECEMBER hosted the family dinner.  Enjoyed the good weather.  Had my first car accident (psst, don’t tell my mother).  Talk about feeling like a villain. 

In short, the first part of the year was spent travelling and the second half was spent writing.  Not a bad way of managing my time.  I also began the serious step of retirement planning with the discovery that while I am financially ready I am mentally unprepared to take the big step.  I can better understand why men have such a difficult time quitting work as it is very defining for them.  2012 will see me working harder on my “psychological profile” to get prepared for retirement.  For those who haven’t yet started thinking about it, mark my words, this is not something you do cold turkey – and I’m not talking about the money angle.  Mentally, there is a lot of prep work to be done.  As the famous quote says “if you continue to do what you’ve always done, you will continue to get what you’ve always got”.  You will be surprised!

From the top, Banos in Equador; bunny at Canmore; WPC reunion; garden centre with my galpals in Salmon Arm; Golden Gate Bridge; the swans at my place - enjoying nature.

December Weather

I had dinner with my mother last night and we talked about global warming.  There are many people who deny that we are in a warming trend but when you see chunks of ice drop off Antarctica double the size of Texas you ought to be questioning what is happening.  This past year the globe has seen 11 significant disasters caused by weather (3 deadly hurricanes,           

There is no denying we are in global warming trend but what are the movers and shakers doing about it?  Our own prime minister has rejected the Kyoto accord without committing to any alternative.  The United States has never accepted the accord.  Two nations who want to be world leaders not committing to environmental protection?  What makes either country better than China who clearly doesn’t care about anything but money, money, money?  It doesn’t.  The fact is that most of our leaders are only out for themselves; they have the backs of their families (one suspects anyway) but the rest of us peons are simply that, peons.  We are not protected and when the disaster strikes we will be left out in the cold quite literally.

            Given that this is the way it really is, that governments are simply a phantasm run by greedy, corrupt human beings, why do we give so much weight to being law-abiding citizens?  Because we are told this is the way we ought to be, we ought to be civilized.  I’ve thought about this quite a lot and in my considered opinion most people are genuinely good and want things to be good, fair and equal for all.  There is a handful of people around the globe who want Everything.  I find it incomprehensible, but this is the fact.  This is why we will never become a truly civilized World.  Some few people cannot endure the idea of anyone else having something They Want.  It’s really quite frightening when you think about it long enough.

            When I watch these programs about The End, I find myself being extremely vengeful and just wishing the absolute worst will happen to these greedy bastards.  And yet, whenever humanity begins something new, right away you will find a few “leaders” making it cushy for themselves.  The book “Animal Farm” is such a perfect allegory of what happens to us, time and time again.  When will we learn?  Watching the polar bears on the Coca Cola commercial and crunching the numbers they are donating, please, give me a break.  Who are you kidding?  We will never learn, the polar bears will die off and then we will follow them into the icy cold waters that swallow up the land.

            That’s my thought of the day as I count down to 2012.

A Mary Richards Party

Do you remember Mary’s disastrous dinner parties?  Where the guests don’t show up or the wrong ones show up; the food is a failure and conversation goes nowhere?          I remember talking to my sister over the phone after she had her first dinner party and she said “It was a Mary Richards party” and I knew instantly what she meant. 

There is nothing worse than holding a party and having most of the guests not show up.  This has happened to me several times so this year I decided to make it a Come & Go event so people could show up whenever they liked and leave as they liked.  It really did not work much better as most of the guests still did not show up but the positive thing was that I had scaled down on the food so there were no real leftovers this time.

So how does one become a successful hostess?  A non-Mary Richards?  I decided to troll the internet for advice and the very first item was Miss Abigail’s lifting of advice from a 1930’s book entitled (oddly enough) “How to be a Successful Hostess” written by Charlotte and Thelma Clarke (with names like that this has to be good).

“To be known as a brilliant entertainer is the sincere wish of each hostess. Beyond measure she covets the high opinion of her friends regarding her ability to carry on social activities in a competent and winning manner.”  The book then proceeds to advise on a variety of games to be played.  Games?  Okay,  I will stuff that in the archive of “things to do”.

I then jumped over to WikiHow and got a list of 15 items, all of which are already checked off on my list except the last.  Games.

Redbook and Global News also have tips on parties which include, big surprise, Games.

I am sensing a trend now.  So this is where I have been going wrong?  Shall I mention games will be the theme at my next party?  Risqué games or Xbox games?  If this is the clue that I have been missing there is one thing that I do have.  An ace up my sleeve.  I have a nephew who is THE Gamesmaster of all time.  Lookout everyone, you are about to get outsmarted by A Successful Hostess.

But first I need 364 days to plan the event of all time!

Boxing Day 2011

My first memorable Boxing Day sale happened when I was about 24 when my parents took us to the Woolco in Marlborough Mall back in the day when the mall was basically an indoor strip mall.  I remember standing at a bin of something or other, holding one item in my hand and realizing that it had been ripped out of my hand by an ethnic person.  I looked up in shock but said “that was in my hand” and she very grudgingly handed it back to me.  Today I understand that would never have happened.  The grabber would pull out pepper spray and attack me full force to get the tea towel for 29 cents!  Such is the price of a bargain.

            As I’ve written it’s long past that I would venture out on Boxing Day.  The day I got squeezed in a doorway was “The End” for me.  I didn’t even go in the store, I turned around and went somewhere else.  No lineups for me.  With every advancing year I grow more like my father who used to say “I would faint if I was in a lineup even as a boy”.  I don’t know how true that was for him but when I am in a lineup and I am merely the second or third in line I can have an internal conniption fit when the first person takes 200 years to get his debit card approved. 

            Now here is a true, UNEXAGGERATED story about my experiences at Michael’s in Okotoks.  No word of a lie.  I have been there twice when it wasn’t Christmas time and this is what has happened.

            The first time there was a lineup at the till (which by the way is set up really stupidly).  There was only one teller and I was the fourth person in line.  The first couple were paying their items separately (???) and then BOTH of them decided they were going to use a different card.  I thought I was going to faint, this exchange took at least 8 minutes (by my watch).  Then the second person in the lineup got her turn.  Geez Louise, she needed to ring her items in as two separate bills.  God give me strength.  So this transaction took another 7 minutes.  The math means that already I have been waiting in line for 15 minutes to buy something which I don’t even remember what it was – oh yes, I had found some personalized stickers for my envelopes and as they were rare I thought I better just stick it out.

            At last the third person gets up there and her F’ing card did not work.  I do not believe this is happening to me.  Where is the second teller?  What the H is going on here?  Out comes the wallet with her other card, mercifully she gets finished.  That took 5 minutes.

            I get up to the till and I pull out cash.  No problems with me, I am out in 30 seconds.  People, I ask you?

            So last Wednesday I mosey on over to Michael’s for my second experience.  Granted this time it is Christmas but it is about 2:00 on a workday and there is only one person in the lineup.  You will never guess what happened.  She finishes the transaction almost as soon as I get in the lineup and then she says

            “I want to use my other card.”

            Only in Okotoks.

Christmas Day 2011

This Christmas Day was unusual.  For one thing we had one of our rare brown Christmases when the temperature was in the double digits – on the plus side.  Today I spent the day at my brother’s house and we had a seafood lunch, again unusual.  Not the usual leftover duck from Christmas Eve.

            And this morning my mother was at my house having breakfast with me!  That was such a nice treat for me.  I could give her breakfast in bed, only she wanted it in the dining room so that’s what we did.  We had a leisurely breakfast and a wonderful talk about the evening before and then about this and that.  We was nice and cozy.  Then she watched me open all the gifts that I save for my Christmas morning.  These are all the gifts that I saved from all my Canadian friends.  This is a little tradition that I made for myself since I celebrated Christmas Day in my own home.

            Later Erik and I drove Mom home to John’s and on the drive she told some funny stories about herself.  First she told us how she was teasing John about how slowly she ate her box of Gajol licorice until she only had one left.  Then as she readied for bed she ate her various pills one by one, with a little sip of water.  Then she picked up the Gajol and took a sip of water and whip, down the throat it slid until she realized “my last licorice”!  And she let out a little yelp and John called from the living room “what happened?” and she came out looking foolish.

            “I just swallowed my licorice like a pill.”

            She laughed and said she wanted to regurgitate it!

            Then she said when she was down visiting Jeanette she had written all her Christmas cards and on the drive to get the stamps Jeanette pointed out where the mailbox was situated close to her house.  Mom said “that is a strange colour for a mailbox” but Jeanette didn’t  pay attention and just kept chatting away.  They got home, Mom affixed the stamps and decided to go for a breath of fresh air and headed down to the mailbox.  She walked around it, and around it, stood up on the cement block and tried to find the mail shute.  She thought “what a strange mail box”.  Then she stepped back and looked at this grey green box and suddenly she looked into the distance and saw the familiar red mailbox.  Good grief, she thought, I’ve been looking at the wrong thing.  So she posted the mail and got back to the house and told Jeanette what had happened.

            So what was she looking at?  An electrical terminal server.  It was a miracle she didn’t electrocute herself!

            Mom says “at least I can laugh at myself when I am such a fool!”  Oh Mom!

Blessings on Christmas Eve

Do you ever get tired of people telling you to count your blessings?  It can be a bit trite, especially at this time of year when you are probably worrying about bills, family squabbles, getting off work in time to do the last bit of shopping and who knows what besides!  But if you can find your way out of the forest and start looking at the trees you can perhaps realize that you are indeed blessed.

            For one thing, you are most likely living in Canada which is possibly the safest country in the world to live in.  Too often we take for granted the fact that we can walk down the street in safety, drive where we want, shop where we want and pretty much say what we want.  Most of us, thankfully, have a job.  Food is readily available to us and there is lots of it in the stores.  In fact our country is pretty lavish in consumable goods.

            You probably have a friend you can turn to if only to listen to your woes.  As Jimmy Stewart said in “Winchester ‘73”, if you have one friend, you are rich.  I’m rich.

            Sometimes when I sit alone, staring at the computer screen and wondering what to write about, I will get a sinking feeling and wonder “who cares”?  We can all have moments of despair or loneliness but for most of us the feeling passes, luckily very quickly.  There are people that care, and I have a sense of humour to carry me through most things.  I hope you do too.

            Life is a roller coaster of a ride and sometimes we can hit some low spots; but even then, I do hope that you can take a look around you and find that there are blessings in your life.  My mother will quote a Danish saying “It’s never so bad that it isn’t good for something” and you know, she’s usually right.  Using an English truism,  “this too shall pass”, so if you are having a rough spot, a gloomy day or just feeling out of sorts, breathe deeply, go for a walk in the fresh air and think about what is good in your life.  Chances are you will find at least three good things to say thank you for.  Living in this country, having a job, and having family and friends to count on.

            I hope you have a good day!  For some this is Christmas, for others, one more sleep! 

While menfolks and children enjoy all the anticipation of Christmas Eve the women folk are busy making the home a place where everyone (but them) can put their feet up and enjoy the holiday spirit.  Meanwhile we are baking, writing cards, baking, making stewed cabbage, shopping for gifts, baking, shopping for groceries, oops forgot the whipped cream, back to the store, prepare the rice pudding, forgot the prunes back to the store, baking, clean, clean, clean, set the table, find the candles, where are the napkins I got on Boxing Day last year, dig, dig, dig.  Finally we sit down to dinner and the meal is over in 7 minutes (I’ve timed it, thankfully the last few years we are slower, it’s about 12 minutes now).  Then we womenfolk have to clear the table, do the dishes, pack up the leftovers and the men folk gripe about their one little chore, moving the Christmas Tree out to the middle of the room so we can dance and carol around the tree.

            Ah, yes, anticipation.  I anticipate Christmas Day when I can sleep late, have my leftover rice pudding for breakfast in the comfort of my own bed, read my newest book and wait for my phone call from my sister!  Later I will go around my table and look at my gifts and feel glad that my family and friends have remembered me so thoughtfully.  Later still I will make some phone calls to the friends that are home.  Then I will have some more leftovers, watch my favorite Christmas movies like “Last Holiday” with Queen Latifah or “It’s a Wonderful Life” and enjoy Jimmy Stewart calling “Clarence, Clarence”.

            Many years ago I was up to the challenge of Boxing Day Sales but with age comes wisdom; there are still plenty of bargains to be had in January so I wait for the quieter stores.  Instead I like to go out for walks in nature on Boxing Day, have my brother Erik over for lunch and perhaps coax him into training me a little on my weights.  He thinks I am a sad loss as I don’t seem to be able to stick to his regime, or worse argue with his approach.

            Today is a cleaning day for me, all the baking is done and I am in hopes of having someone come over to help yank out the table so I can add more leaves to it.  Tomorrow it’s time to wash the floors and vacuum one final time.  Happily my mother told me she already made the red stewed cabbage so that is a task I can “check”.  I got my ducks yesterday, four of them, and I am anxious watching them thaw in the fridge – it’s a hard chore but someone’s got to do it!

Countdown to Christmas 1, 2, 3 . . .

The last week before Christmas can be stressful as we start to count the things that still need to be done.  And isn’t that a pity, that word “need”.  There is so much to be joyful about this time of year as we start the Spirit of Christmas, enjoying our family, friends and colleagues.  But over this last century Christmas has become so commercial that we lose sight of the real meaning of the season.

            There is the religious aspect of Christmas, the holy celebration of the birth of Jesus Christ our savior.  For most people today the story of Jesus’ birth and of religion as our basis for the holiday is really lost.  The second part of this season is that hand in glove with the first, we want to celebrate with gladness and goodness to those around us.  This part seems to still exist to a very generous degree, but at the same time it seems to take over our life in a very material way. 

            The truth is that we shouldn’t overwhelm our family and friends with outrageously expensive things.  It is nice to give a little something that shows we have thought of them.  If it doesn’t happen then we shouldn’t feel bad.  We are adults, leave the gifts for the little ones, and even then, let’s be sensible about it and not go in debt to give a 6 year old an iPad. 

            I love giving; I really enjoy it when I can find something meaningful or thoughtful to give to a friend.  I get excited when I find a bargain which I can put to good use.  This year I had a lot on my mind and wasn’t able to prowl the stores like I usually do so I didn’t find the surprises of past years.  But I won’t beat myself up about it; this was the year of less in my world.  And that’s okay.  My heart is in the right place, my family and friends know that (I hope) and I plan to enjoy the holidays as a restful time.  I hope you can do the same.

Christmas Memories

When I think of Christmas Past I generally think about the whole day, the events and the food, rather than the gifts.  The truth is that most of the gifts were not terribly memorable, just ordinary gifts of dolls, trucks, games and pajamas.  As we got a little older Farmor would send Jeanette and I pieces of jewelry, or a jewelry case (that was really special and I still have the black leather case with red velvet interior – real velvet not that cheap stuff you generally see).  One year I got a brownie camera as well as a tape recorder, the kind that had two wheels and real tape.  I still have the recording of us singing “Michael Rowed the Boat Ashore”. 

            Over the years we have eaten a lot of ducks.  As the family grew to included grandchildren my mother was up to four ducks in the oven which entailed her moving them up and down the rack in the oven to ensure proper browning.  A few days before Christmas she would chop a huge head of red cabbage to stew in vinegar and cranberry jelly.  About ten days before Christmas she would begin to bake Danish cookies and she would have to bake for several days because we would eat them up so fast! 

            Christmas Eve day I would help set the table, taking out the fine Danish silverware and the best china.  As I got older and started collecting ornaments I would decorate the table with some of the Danish elves (nisser) or bits of evergreen.  I’d fuss with the Christmas napkins, search for fresh candles and hope that I could get a picture of everyone around the table before we dived in like starving cannibals to the poor little ducks!

            My brother John lives on a creek and when the nieces and nephews were old enough to skate (and some not) he would get the creek cleared and ready to play hockey.  We were a sight to behold as we marched down to the creek, some victorious ones with a real hockey stick, the rest of us using rakes and shovels as our weapon of choice.  I generally opted out of the game almost immediately and just skated up and down until my feet got cold.  John had bales of hay set along the banks so we could sit there and watch the “game”.  My brother Erik has no balance at all on skates and was more fun to watch than the children.  After a while we’d stagger back up the hill to the house and Mom would have hot chocolate with real whipping cream ready for us.

            Best Christmas fun ever?  The year we got our skates.  I think I wrote about this last year but I’ll tell it again.  They had wrapped the boxes up beautifully and we dived for those presents first.  We were so excited when we saw the skates on the box and then we opened up the box to find a toothbrush and a couple of candies.  Jeanette started crying right away as Dad said “You get the box this year, next year you will get the skates”.  I was holding it together despite the disappointment but John had already figured out the cruel joke and dived for the rotten gift wrapped up in newspapers and shoved way in the back.  There they were beautiful brand new skates.  Jeanette and I had beautiful figure skates and John had genuine hockey skates.  We could hardly wait to get out on some ice but we had to wait until the next day to go down to the school where an outdoor rink was set up.

            John jumped on the ice and sprawled all over the place but bounced up, sprawled again and just kept going up and down like a jack-in-the-box.  Dad said it was one of the funniest things he had ever seen.  John thought he could just go out on the ice and become a hockey player!  He was maybe r 7 at the time.  That was one of the best Christmases ever.

Card Giving

I love stationery, in fact I am addicted to lovely notepaper and always have been.  From the time I was able to afford buying little boxed notecards I have always held one back as my “collection”.  Two years ago we got a little shop downtown called “Papyrus” and oh my goodness, I love to go in that shop during the holidays.  I have to hold back from buying boxes of cards so I strictly go in “just to look around”.  There are so many pretty cards to choose from but I only allow myself to buy one box to send out to my family and friends.

            Yes, I am still old fashioned enough to spend a weekend addressing the envelopes and then settling down to write a personal note in each card.  Some of my friends get an inserted letter along with the card because we only write to each other once a year.  I am lucky enough to get letters back from them.  When I think about it I realize that it is the type of relationship that existed for many immigrant families or pioneer families that moved away from home to settle elsewhere.  Frequently, in fact most often, these people never saw their home place again, nor the folks they left behind. 

            I can wax nostalgic sometimes and lament  how we have moved forward in the world but some things really do make our lives wonderful.  Having internet, electronic mail, skype and long distance telephoning that is affordable is incredible.  Having an economy that can allow people to travel is also wonderful.  When I think of my mother travelling over the ocean, leaving her parents and siblings behind, some of whom she would never see again, well, I just think that I am pretty lucky to be able to see my mother whenever I want to.

            This weekend my sister came over and handed me a card.  When I opened it up I had to laugh, she had enclosed a picture of her puppy dressed up as a reindeer.  She had made it herself using her camera, computer and printer.  Electronics can be terrific things but I still love Papyrus! 

This pinecone is the one I picked for this year.  Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Cowboys and Cowboys

I grew up with television Westerns.  Back in the day I sat on the floor in front of the television watching “Lawman” with John Russell and Peter Brown as Deputy Johnnie McKay; Cheyenne; Maverick; Laramie.  They caught you first with their introductory music, often with catchy lyrics. 

  

                      Have Gun will travel reads the card of a man

            A knight without armour in a savage land

His fast gun for hire head's the calling wind.
A soldier of fortune is the man called Paladin.
Paladin, Paladin
Where do you roam?
Paladin, Paladin,
Far, far from home.

The stories were usually honest episodes with a little action where our hero came out the winner, righting wrongs on a weekly basis.  One of the later westerns “Laredo” had some good humour in it, sadly lacking in the earlier shows.  Today when I watch reruns of the different westerns I find myself chuckling.  For instance, have you noticed how The Rifleman walks down the street but he is looking sternly into the camera at right angles to the street he is walking down, blasting off his rifle?  I laugh every time I see it, so not right.  And when you see the cowboys wearing spurs and gloves, another big no, no in the real world.  One of the Christmas gifts my brother John got one year was a really beautiful rifle.  Later Peter got a six shooter but he never got the gunbelt to go with it.  Most of the boys in our neighbourhood had some type of six shooter to play with.  Few got the cowboy hats to go with it though.  But every one of us, girl or boy, could throw ourselves on the ground, clutching our breast as we made to die.

            Watching reruns today I am particularly struck with how, in the early days at least, they rarely showed the body of the person shot.  I noticed it particularly in The Virginian and Gunsmoke episodes.  Today they show us cadavers being cut up in front of our eyes.  How real do we want to get with our fantasy?  Apparently the uglier, grittier and nastier the better.  But I look back at the shows I watched as a youngster and then think about the behavior of the children at school.  We didn’t have kids misbehaving in our classroom.  Sure once in a while one of the boys would have to stand in the corner but it was not an every day occurrence; maybe once or twice a year Kurt or Gerald would have to do penance for talking or throwing a paper airplane across the aisle.  Talking with my friends who volunteer in schools they tell me that there are at least 5 or 6 children with “special needs” in a class of 30; frequently it is even more.   Why is that?

            Is it possible to go back to “Leave it to Beaver” and the white picket fence fantasy?  Do we want to go that far?  Remember “My Three Sons” and there little dilemmas?  Even The Brady Bunch and The Partridge Family was pretty innocent stuff.  Today it seems we prefer to watch “Law and Order”and “CSI”.  Our comedies include obnoxious children such as the ones from Rosanne or “Malcolm in the Middle”.

            The westerns gave us the dab of violence we need in our life but ended on a note that told us that good would always triumph over evil.  You went to bed knowing that Daniel Boone and Davy Crocket were heroes who always did the right thing.  And the girls?  Well, we knew that we could never marry Little Joe or Adam because if we got engaged to them we would croak for sure!  But that’s another story.

Twas the Week Before Christmas

Twas the week before Christmas and all through the office

Not an employee was working, not thou I looked twice

The mail boxes were gapping by the copy room door

In hopes that the bonuses would come on the floor

The bosses were meeting in every board room

Trying to stave off the danger of world economic gloom

And Palo in her blazer and I in my jacket

Were settling our roles into a neat little packet

When out in the hall there came a loud clatter

Office services were delivering lunch on a platter

Away to the kitchen we flew in a group

Eating the crackers while staying in the loop

Then we hear the bosses exclaim as they see us on site

Thanks for the hard work, now let’s have a food fight!

Tragedy in Small Town

We had a terrible shock this morning when the small town next to ours had a triple murder and suicide.  Happenings like this are rare in small towns and Claresholm has never had anything like it.  Naturally the town was all abuzz with this terrible tragedy.  I had a considerable shock when the story escalated from an “accident on the highway north of Claresholm” to “suicide and murder”.  Since I know a number of people in the community I was terribly worried until the evening news when they said the victims were not from the town.

            I always feel terrible when I hear the story of a sudden death at any time of the year but when it is close to Christmas I feel especially sad for the families.  Their lives will never be the same but to have it near a joyous holiday is particularly sad.  I have mentioned that my baby sister was born on Christmas Eve so her passing near her birthday is doubly difficult for my mother even 55 years later.  Twelve years ago my father went into the hospital on Christmas Day and passed on New Year’s Eve. 

            It takes some time to overcome the memories but eventually one has to come to grips with the tough stories.  Life is a bumpy road, long, straight strips and then some curves, some potholes, detours and who knows what will meet you along the way.  Not every day can be cheerful, sometimes we are allowed to drink the cup of sorrow, but I hope that we can also look around us and remember there are good people in our lives who can help to make the road a little easier.  Good friends and family, supportive colleagues and neighbours can all help even if it is just to listen and hold your hand and share a cup of tea with you.

            There are also natural sights to make us smile and be happy.  Just a clean dusting of snow on the lawn and the trees; the sun slanting through evergreens where the tiniest birds are feeding; rabbit prints in the snow leading into tall grass; a Christmas card from a cousin far away; the smell of baked cookies coming out of Mom’s oven; a cheery Merry Christmas on the telephone; an old ornament leaning against a picture frame . . .

            There are some sad families in the world today . . . my heart goes out to you.

Awkward Ages, Goofy Gifts

Do you remember your worst Christmas gift?  Jeanette and I both remember the Christmas in Montreal as our worst Christmas ever.  My gift was gross green ski pants (when everyone was wearing bell bottoms).  Jeanette was 14 and got a toy sewing machine.  What were my parents thinking?  They panicked and shopped on Christmas Eve and simply grabbed the first thing they saw.  My father had been working very long hours and had no time to shop so presto!  thoughtless gifts.

            I tried to swallow my disappointment but it was hard.  That year or two between being a child and a teenager was difficult.  My parents simply didn’t think how we would react.  I think Jeanette was scarred for life!  All I know is that it didn’t happen again.  I think part of the solution was that my parents started to give us Christmas money to buy gifts for the other kids which added to the fun.  I could make $10.00 stretch like nobody’s business.  I remember getting my brothers comic books and those TV books (I think Peter still has F-Troop and I still have Mod Squad) and getting Evening in Paris perfume for my mother.  Dad usually got cigarettes or a bic lighter (in those days a pack of cigarettes was 35 cents).  Jeanette got bubble bath or mittens or a toque.  Often the kids would get some type of boxed game or a deck of cards.  One year I bought my dad a broom and tied licorice sticks on it.

            When I started earning my own money I started doing the Boxing Day sales and I would shop in January for good sales.  Yes, for Christmas gifts for the family.  I always had a stash of gifts in my closet and sometimes I even forgot what I had bought for them.  It was so much fun finding a “deal”.  Who doesn’t love a good deal?  A couple of years ago I found those little knit gloves for 39 cents.  Who can say no to that.  I bought them all!  Surprise Book Club.

            A couple of weeks ago a survey said that 44.6% of kids between the ages of 6 and 12 wanted an iPad.  Good heavens!  I would never have dreamed of asking my parents for a gift that cost $100 – or even $50.00.  In fact, I don’t know that we ever actually “asked” for anything.  My mother was pretty observant and would notice what we were looking at in the store.  The thing was that very early in life we had been told in no uncertain terms not to plague her (yes, plague her – in Danish).  “Ikke plagge mig” she would say and if we dared asking for Oreo cookies in the grocery store there would be a whack on the ear or a slap across our legs.  No, we did not ask for anything in the store. When we went to the Woolworth I would make a beeline for the doll department.  The doll department was a row of dolls laying  neatly in a bin (in those days there weren’t the kind of shelves we see today).  If I had seen a ToysRUs store I would have thought I was dreaming.  There were maybe 20 dolls or so laid out.  I never strayed very far from the dolls so needless to say I got a lot of dolls when I was a kid.

            My mother often sent us a game and the day of Christmas Eve we often played Monopoly or Ludo.  These days my nephew Christopher is our Games Master and we are forced, yes forced, to play games as part of the Christmas entertainment.  It is actually fun to see him organize us and sit there like the little teacher he is while he instructs us in the latest game.  “Things” is the latest game he has brought around and that is a lot of fun.  Also “Apples to Apples” (I think that’s the name) is quite fun.  Just a hint in case you are a games person!

            11 more sleeps!

Playing with Dolls

My mother comments when we go into department stores’ toy sections that there are hardly any baby dolls.  It’s true there are not very many choices in baby dolls anymore.  I don’t think children really play with dolls the way we did when we were little and before the invention of Barbie. 

            I wonder if kids don’t know how to play Mommy because their mothers go to work?  My mother can tell you the story of me playing House.  I would stand in the middle of the room and swing my hips like fury while I whisked with an imaginary bowl and beater.  I was making whipped cream, I said.  My mother laughed as she realized that she must have been standing just like that in the kitchen while she used the hand held mixer (no electric appliances back then) while she beat up her cream or eggs.  I had an eagle eye for watching all her moves around the house and I imitated every one of them.

            Classic Sanne.  Hands on hips, one hand raises and points, shaking finger at the culprit.

            “You better smarten up, or else.”

            When I had to watch over my siblings I would march into the kitchen and simply shake the drawer with the wooden spoon in it and all would fall to submission (except John).  I didn`t even have to take out the wooden spoon, I could hear Peter and Erik flying into their bunk beds.

            My dolls were even more docile, I never had to turn them over my knee to spank them.  I usually just liked to change their clothes and then lay them in the little wooden apple crate that was turned into a bed (remember when apples came in those wooden crates with the handle).  Then I would read them a story from one of the little Hans Christian Andersen booklets that we got one Christmas.  It even had a little cardboard box made like a book shelf so we could put the booklets neatly away.

            In the summertime we mostly played outside.  There was an ancient weeping willow tree in the corner of our backyard but belonged to the Rolstons.  We used to play under that tree all summer long and Little Susan would bring out all her baby dolls and real crib and real high chair and all the clothes.  Goodness but she had a lot of clothes.  Mrs. Rolston’s friend back in Nova Scotia would make all kinds of dolls clothes so Susan always came back from her summer vacation with new clothes for her dolls.  My mother was too busy making clothes for real live to children to have much time to make doll clothes but she did once in a while.  I had some nice knit baby outfits for my Mary.  Susan and I would play House for hours. 

            Playing dolls was a quiet game but we had hours of fun.  I hardly remember what we would say when we played house.  I just remember having a good time.

December Marches Along

Yesterday the Book Club had brunch at the Danish Canadian Club which is rather a tradition with us.  I do love December for all the traditions that belong to this very social month.  It is true there are still crabby people in malls and parking lots but there are also a lot of friendly people who are more polite than they otherwise might be.  There are more smiles in the aisles of the stores, particularly if you are there early, before the crowds start to make one impatient.

            This year I have noticed how very sad the live trees, plants and wreaths are however.  I don’t know why they all look so dried up and have done for a couple of weeks already.  Lesson learned, don’t start the process quite so early folks.  I’ve been looking at the live wreaths because I thought it would be perfect in the sunroom but they already look shrivelled up so what is the point, may as well have artificial.

            Do you have traditions in your family, over and above the regular ones, like putting the child-made ornaments at the back of the tree?  Baking, wrapping, and so on?  We have our Danish traditions and let me tell you it was a shock to discover how few families in Denmark dance around their trees anymore!  What, no dancing around the tree and singing those terrible Danish carols?  I looked reproachfully at my mother with raised eyebrows.  But we still have to sing the song about not touching “that raisin”.  It never made sense to me even as a child but it was necessary to complete my parents’ happiness!  I have my special ornaments that have to be placed here and there whether anyone will see them besides myself or not.  I have tried to be brave and not decorate at all but I simply find it too boring not to have some things up. 

            We never had outdoor lights at our house.  My father was never a handyman so this was one thing he felt he could forego without too much excusing. It wasn’t Danish, end of story.  Having tried to put lights up myself I mentally say “it’s not Danish”.  The truth is it is a pain in the gazoo to put them up!  With the wind whistling down from the mountains it is also rather lethal.  I heard them clanking against the side of the house and thought “what a waste of money” as they all smashed to bits.  Bye, bye, artificial lights.  When the children were little we would have a few live candles on the tree for the little while as we danced around the tree, quickly put out after the dancing to ensure that the house didn’t go up in flames.  But we kids loved it, and later the grand kids loved it too.  Candles are part of Christmas.

            At the Danish Canadian Club I noticed that they had the traditional candelabra but they had those little solar lights instead of live candles.  I thought, what a good idea, in a restaurant.  But this afternoon when I have my afternoon tea I will be putting on the advent lights as I settle down to finish my card writing. 

            “It’s tradition.”