Taxes and Civility

I’ve just spent an hour searching for last year’s tax assessment as my accountant always asks for that when she prepares my taxes.  I searched, and searched, and searched all the while not understanding why I had not put it in my folder as I usually do.  At the end of the search the form was lying on my desk with “2011” written on it so i therefore ignored it because my brain was not computing that 2011 was actually the current assessment.  I just hate it when I am not with-it.

       Which brings me to this year’s tax ads.  Is it just me or commercials getting more crude with each passing year?  I was taken aback a few years ago when I first heard the ads for colonoscopies “we’re behind your behind”.  While that isn’t crude in the extreme it is a little bit risqué in nature.  This year’s tax ads allude to being screwed in the butt with their tax pain in the behind.  Calgary also has a new campaign for distracted driving which says “crotches kill”.  There was a whole series of surveys on whether that one was going to be effective to which I respond loudly “no, of course not”.  The only thing that is going to get those particular idiots’ attention is losing their license for 3 months.  Meanwhile the rest of us must endure yet another crude campaign.

       My concern is not stemming from prudishness but from concern that we are becoming an increasingly callous society.  Last week we had a distressing example of just how callous we have become when an older woman, in a crosswalk, was run down by 2 hit-and-run drivers as well as having 2 other vehicles drive around the body and just leave it there.  Furthermore, the only person who came to her aid was a woman who heard the accident from inside her house.  Meanwhile, there were apparently onlookers at a bus stop who stood and did nothing.  All of this happened around 7:45 a.m. therefore it was no longer dark outside.  On the surface, it is incomprehensible that such a thing could happen in Calgary but when you look a little closer at how people conduct themselves out on the street perhaps it isn’t that surprising after all.  For example, have you noticed how people expect you to have ESP and notice when the person sitting beside you on the bus or train rises and needs to get passed you.  There is no one who says “excuse me, this is my stop” because that would mean you would have to expend some breath on communicating with the stranger sitting beside you despite the fact that you’ve shared your personal history while talking on a cellphone for 25 minutes.  Gosh, how silly of me to expect communication from such a moron.  People seldom speak to other human beings whether they know you or not so heaven forbid that someone should come to the aid of a poor 52 year old woman who has been knocked to the ground by one car and then dragged some 25 feet by another vehicle.  Because we wouldn’t want to show compassion to a woman who obviously was asking for it – by crossing the street at a designated crosswalk in broad daylight.

       Civility, that is something that happened in a bygone age where ankles were not revealed and no one had a crotch. 

Now I will deal with my taxes which is so much more soothing than having to deal with the moronic population I am forced to live amongst.  Now, that’s irony.

Oscar Buzz . . . again

This year I found myself bored by all the award shows which seemed to be coming up every darn weekend since before Christmas.  It can be really tiring to see these uber type A’s patting themselves on the back so publicly.  But now the big weekend is upon us and of course I cannot help wondering Who Will Win?  I have the audacity to make my picks despite not having seen even one of the movies yet but heck why be shy about it?  I am confident that I can make my picks with just as much aplomb as the jerk critic who wrote “the disappointing It’s Complicated” while writing about Alec Baldwin and Steve Martin’s stint as hosts of the Oscars.  Not sure what planet he is from but this was a highly successful, and quite hilarious, movie.

       Best Movie – Lincoln

Best Director – Spielberg  (although there is an off chance that Zero Dark Thirty and Kathryn Bigelow could grab both).

Best Actor – Daniel Day-Lewis (although I think Joaquin Phoenix should get it for not getting it as Johnny Cash – that performance was outstanding)

Best Actress – Jessica Chastain (I know they are saying Jennifer Lawrence is odds on favourite but I’m saying not yet)

Best Supporting Actress – Sally Field (yes I know everyone is saying Anne Hathaway)

Best Supporting Actor –  Robert de Niro

In the supporting categories I find that rarely is it easy for anyone to make the winning choice so I am picking my favorites. 

      To be honest after all these years of watching the Oscars I find myself not caring very much who wins.  The most exciting part of the show this year will be hearing Adele sing her song from “Skyfall”.  And looking at the dresses.

Mother Gets a Makeover

The first thing we do is cut back on the daily news hour programs.  Then I tell her to focus on the positive side of any story she reads in the mini-newspaper she gets during the week.  I bring home educational magazines and leave them strategically around the house so that she might venture to pick them up despite not being 20 year old Danish magazines.  I venture to mention some of the nuggets that I have found inspirational in various books, shows and magazines. 

       Giving my mother a positive makeover is a super challenge since she can get stubborn all of a sudden.  One minute she is a compliant little girl and the next WHAM! baby monster is born again.  Last night we were talking about religion and being sensibly philosophical when suddenly she had me giggling and then roaring with laughter.  As we talked about life after death she reminded me about an event that occurred some years ago.  She woke up very suddenly to feel absolutely ice cold with her teeth chattering so hard they were almost breaking.  She looked me in the eye and said very matter of factly “I may have been dead”.  Like this happens to her every day.  I nearly choked on my meat and then couldn’t stop laughing. 

       I can be as philosophical or as dogmatic as I like but the truth is my mother continues to amaze me.  No matter how pessimistic she might be she still has a great sense of humour.  If you have humour you really do see the bright side of things.

A mediocre person tells. A good person explains. A superior person demonstrates. A great person inspires others to see for themselves."
Harvey Mackay

February Blues

It’s our Family Day today and instead of feeling cheerful I feel tired every time I look out of the window and see the grey skies, patches of snow and vibrating branches which mean the wind is up.  The solution is to close the blinds, turn on all the lights and start baking!  Even my critters are running back inside after sticking their noses out in the frosty air.  I know we are supposed to have an early spring and that this is just a tiny blip but for the moment it feels like we are back in November.

       Now we have all heard of solutions to pull us out of the doldrums and that is exactly what I have done; I hopped on my treadmill and walked for half an hour at a good, rapid pace and it’s true I do feel energized.  But looking at greyness can turn anyone bleak if you look at it long enough.  Hence the “closing the blinds” solution.  But to ensure that it is a true solution the inside needs to look cheerful, homey and welcoming which at the moment my house does not (you will remember I am still in renovation mode that includes losing storage).  However, I chose to look past the piles of books, pillows, pictures and other paraphernalia to see the comforts of home.  It helps a great deal to have a mother who can bake up a storm and serve tea or coffee at the drop of a hat.

       This week we had a lunch and learn topic on stress and the question was asked how can one turn a pessimist into an optimist.  The speaker said it was difficult but it could be done, if the pessimist wanted to make the changes.  I think it is as hard to change one’s outlook as it is to change one’s exercise habits but if you are willing to try, you can do it.  My mother is a bit of a pessimist and it is a challenge for me to get her to look at things from a different point of view but I persevere.  I’m an optimist and I am also the type who does not give up easily, so Mom’s new outlook on life is a challenge I will take on.  As the speaker also said, it’s good to have constant interests to keep each day exciting and new.

       Well spring is around the corner and until it bursts upon us I will be renovating my house and my mother.  Life is good.

Repercussion

Most people believe in goodness, fairness and doing the right thing.  Many corporations have mission statements, corporate values and codes of ethics which endorse doing the right thing and some may even have a hotline for reporting on questionable conduct.  One could certainly expect this standard of behaviour in our church and state representatives but first and foremost one would expect this from our law enforcement officers.  Imagine my shock and dismay when a friend recently shared her brother’s story with me revealing the opposite of my expectations.

       Imagine when two police officers go to their staff sergeant to report a questionable incident they witnessed and they are told to “shut up and forget about it”.  Imagine that they do what they are told only to witness many similar incidents to the point where they feel they must once again speak up only to be told even more forcefully to “shut up, forget about it and NO ONE LIKES A RAT”.  Suddenly reporting on questionable behaviour makes you a tattletale, a rat, the lowest form of life in the police world!  Beating people in handcuffs is now more acceptable behaviour than “telling on them”.  When does reporting outrage become bad?  Does this mean that a wife cannot report her husband’s abuse because she is “telling on him”?  Does this mean that if you know your boss is taking kickbacks you cannot “rat  him out”?  Are you now between a rock and a hard place because you know what is going on so now you become part of the problem, you are silently complicit?

       While not sharing these police officers’ full story here please know that I am 100% convinced of the truth of the allegations and I am deeply shocked and saddened that this type of corruption, and yes I do call this corruption, is happening in our Canadian police force.  The story is straight out of a Law & Order episode but imagine my shock to know that it is not an isolated incident and that the staff sergeant then “leaked” the story to others and suddenly the whole police force was aware of these “rats” who were upset and alarmed that fellow police officers were beating up handcuffed perps.  Are you serious?  An upstanding law enforcement officer is supposed to shut up and accept brutality here in CANADA.  Are you crazy?  Really, can this be possible, IN CANADA?

       I have always believed that while lines may get blurred at what is a tattletale and what is responsible reporting there can be no doubt that brutality or outright criminality must be reported at the earliest possible opportunity.  It’s one thing to stay silent if you see your boss taking home a box of pens from the supply room and quite another to know he is receiving a new car because he’s awarded a contract to a supplier.  One of the reasons I do not watch the show Blue Bloods is that I cannot stand the character Danny after I saw him, a police officer, shoving a handcuffed perp’s head in a toilet to try to get information out of him.  I do not care if he is a drug dealing villain, it is not acceptable for a police officer to brutalize someone in his custody.  IT IS NOT ACCEPTABLE, I do not care, it is NOT ACCEPTABLE. 

       Has our society lost the need for clear black and white lines when it comes to law enforcement?  Are we so jaded that we say “everyone does it”?  No, everyone does NOT do it.  I absolutely cannot condone a law enforcement officer using any type of brute force on someone who is already handcuffed and in custody.  Two officers against one handcuffed person does not require kicking in the head and being punched like a punching bag by Rocky for heaven’s sake!  What is the matter with people to think you should close your eyes to this.  To know that this is happening on a regular basis and still – you do nothing to prevent it?

       And then the worst happens.  A 17 year old, unarmed boy is dead.

       A true story.

Latifundium - A Country Estate

Now there is a word you do not hear every day (pronounced lat-ee-fun-dee-um) and it means a large country estate.  To be very honest, until it popped up in my Word of the Day calendar yesterday I had never heard of it but I will enjoy rolling that one out of my mouth when I invite my friends to my latifundium.

       Many city people have the dream of retiring into the countryside but over the last few decades country living has now become more expensive than city living.  Whenever something becomes fashionable the price seems to skyrocket and in the case of country living the trend has been towards acreages with a very large house.  In the olden days a dilapidated farm house was the plan, something to be fixed up and become the retirement hobby; a Green Acres if you will. 

       Country living today is not cheap; grocery store prices are as much as 50% higher than city prices and the smaller the town the less competition there is.  As well, there are fewer alternate stores such as hardware stores, clothing stores, drug stores, etc.  In some towns there aren’t any of these shops at all, only a “convenience store”.  Interestingly enough even in these tiny villages there manages to be a liquor store which can only mean that this is always a store that can survive a small population.  Entertainment is limited to hockey, curling and school plays.  I’m not quite sure what the entertainment is in the summertime because there is nothing in town.

       Now you are asking “so what is the appeal of country living”?  Entertainment doesn’t have to be organized within buildings (i.e. movies, clubs, etc.).  Instead there is all the pleasure of the outdoors, be it simply in sitting in wide open spaces, developing gardens, virtual farming, or enjoying the peace and quiet of no traffic by road or air.  When I am visiting over night in the city my senses are always a little shocked by all the night noises that never, ever recede.  When you live in the city you become accustomed to those sounds to the point of not even hearing them (I was once a city dweller myself) but for someone who has lived for more than 30 years in the country it is really distracting.  What wakes me on a summer morning is the sound of birds tweeting and sometimes I will hear birds hopping on my roof.

       Bliss.

Valentine's Day for this Single Girl

I happen to be reading a very funny book called “How to be Single” by Liz Tuccillo (who also coauthored “He’s Just Not That Into You” and wrote for Sex and the City).  There are many laugh out loud moments in the book but there are also some very sad segments.  So on this day for lovers I ask the question, where is communication in your relationship?  If you are not satisfied with how things are in the relationship do you tell your partner or do you keep it to yourself?

       In the book one of the women is completely blindsided when her soon-to-be ex-husband tells her that he’s been unhappy in the marriage for 5 years.  Really, and he never once bothered to tell her things were going sour?  Okay, so she took him for granted, okay so there was no sex for 5 years.  Since when do you wait 5 years before you tell someone that this is not working for you?  I’m really sorry but what kind of jerk sulks around for that long and then runs off with a Brazilian samba dancer and only after the fact says, oh by the way, I’ve been unhappy for 5 years? 

       It seems to me that Valentine’s Day becomes more commercial every year or maybe I just seem to notice it more these days.  But the commercials, the TV shows, even the talk shows all seem to blow Valentine’s Day into this huge, momentous day.  That bothers me not just because I am single, but I wonder why this day is so valued when Remembrance Day gets shoved aside?  In one way we see people flag waving like mad to get our boys overseas and yet on the day when we ought to be honouring them we barely get a half day off (and how many companies shove this day into a corner so they can take an extra day at Christmas – seriously?)  That’s right, Remembrance Day isn’t “commercial”, after all death is not really saleable except as it relates to dying like a hero.

       Don’t get me wrong, it’s nice to have a special day for lovers, and I like roses, chocolates and diamonds as much as the next girl, but honestly, let’s try to keep things in proportion.  It’s not the end of the world if your honey misses the day! 

       My last advice – talk, talk, talk!

Getting Mad

Our provincial auditor broke the news yesterday that Alberta Health Services has spent $100 million in expenses in the last 17 months; expenses include Calgary Flames tickets, Stampede grandstand shows, $300 taxi rides among other things.  In reading the report I discovered some other serious areas of concern, such as double dipping by having a car allowance and yet also charging mileage.  Really?  That is not something that is allowed in the private sector, why is it happening here? 

       Clearly the report discusses that there is no oversight with respect to expense claims, there are many cases of non-compliance, despite the fact that this concern was raised in a 2008 report.  Now my understanding of this report is that it was specifically mandated to review expenses.  I just wonder what other abuses are occurring not only within Alberta Health Services but throughout our political structure, municipal, provincial and federal. 

What I would like to know now is how many people are equally riled up with this very blatant abuse of taxpayer dollars being pilfered at the expense of essential services.  How much can we take of being put under a yoke of taxes only to see the money going to the privileged special appointees while services continue to be cut willy nilly.  The fact is, cuts are causing hardship mentally, physically and emotionally while we are financially misused by our so-called leaders.

It’s time to stand up for ourselves and say NO MORE, loud and clear. 

Below is the link to the report as well as a link to AlbertaConnects where you can find information on how to contact the Alberta Health Minister in various ways. 

Link to report:  http://www.oag.ab.ca/files/oag/OAGFeb2013report.pdf

Alberta Health Minister, Fred Horne, link:  http://alberta.ca/contact.cfm#AlbertaConnects

Amazing Sunday Sunshine

You know what I love about Sundays?  Tranquility.  I especially love the tranquility when Mother Nature agrees to be kind and in the spirit of the day.  Living in the countryside I find that Sundays are usually quiet although even as I write there is a rush of vehicles at my corner.  But that is unusual for a Sunday as most often the farmers around here are sleeping in until noon or even later. 

       It’s February but the sun is shining softly, the snow from yesterday is already gone, there is the merest wisp of a breeze and the tiny birds are back and looking for the seeds in the bird feeder.  Spring is in the air, Balzac Billy hit it right this year, an early spring.  Daylight is back, the days stretch longer and longer, and potential starts to whisper in my ear.  I ignore the stacks of stuff that belong in the still being renovated room and pull out notebooks, texts, pencils and pens and settle down to await the muse.  I close my eyes and go into Haiku mode which I find is a simple way to begin the writing process.  I ignore the poor quality, this is simply how I like to start because yes, I am seeking that boundless potential, but in a soft way.

       There are different ways to approach things and I freely confess I am often a weekend warrior where I pull out all the stops.  I put on hiking boots, I put on down vest, ear slings, working gloves and then I pull out the tools and go for it in the garden.  Sometimes I hack down trees, I haul dead branches, I rake pile upon pile of leaves and finally I will take the mower and go for it, bushwhacker mode.  I can be a ninja and pull out my sketch books or canvas and start putting lines down.  I can settle down in the office and start forming words on the computer.  Yes, I can go for it with gusto, no doubt about that.

       But it’s February, it’s on the cusp of spring, it’s a tranquil Sunday morning and I feel the muse that leads me to close my eyes and imagine poetry.

Writing and Numbers

I’ve signed up for a publishing course in a few weeks time so now I am under pressure to get back in the writing saddle.  It’s not as though I don’t have a lot of thoughts running through my mind, it’s simply a case of trying to nail down one or two of them and start making a solid story out of them. 

Meanwhile life is running away from me.  I simply look at my calendar and I go “what the heck is going on with the time” as in, “is it really February?  Where did January go?”  As each day trickles into the next I start to feel a bit of panic because, let’s face it, 60 is just around the corner!  Sixty, 60, SIXTY, 60, no matter how you write it . . . that is one big number!  All my life I have been unfazed by age, I’ve never panicked as I turned the decades but I will admit that I feel a lot of trepidation as I approach 60.  This number has always seemed like an old number, even older than 70 although that may seem absurd.  But 60 is definitely stepping over the threshold of late middle age into (gasp) OLD AGE. 

There’s plenty of talk about a certain age being the new younger number.  Like 50 is the new 40 and so on however, a number is a number and an age is an age.  It’s not simply a case of me feeling as though I am still 18 years old in my heart because my reality is that my career is on the downturn.   Recently I actually had someone say to my face “do you mean that you are redundant” because I told him to do it himself.  If you are surprised that he walked away without a limp let’s just say that I am mellowing in my old age.  However, there was evil in my heart and he certainly experienced The Look.  He hasn’t lingered in my doorway since.

Yes, life is galloping away on me and it’s time to seriously consider why I am still working at something that no longer inspires me.  I need to really think about what I want to do that thrills me, excites me and perhaps even make me a little money.  40 years of mundane needs to stop and I need to work on that Boundless Potential I read about recently.

So here we go!

Rock n Roll - Good Times

When I was a youngster I used to see my mother doing the housework to good old rock n roll music.  By the time I was a teenager I was enlisted as Mom’s DJ and would stack the record player with her favorite songs while she went at her daily chores.  She loved Elvis but she also liked some more edgy songs of the day such as “The Night Chicago Died”, “Another Saturday Night” and “Magnet and Steel”.  We edged her into the BeeGees, Donna Summers, ABBA, The Guess Who and even the Rolling Stones. 

       Reflecting back on those days I realize that our house was always full of sound, whether it was with talk or with music or the louder voices of kids fighting.  Yet it wasn’t filled with tension or stress, despite the noise it was still a very tranquil household.  The might sound a little odd, that there could be tranquility in the midst of noise but it’s actually true.  There were 8 of us in the house, there was music, television, younger kids playing and running around, my mother working away in the kitchen, setting the table and cooking supper.  When Dad got home there was always a lot of kids running to greet him and with his big voice filling the house there was little silence until he settled down to his newspaper.  The house seemed to have a certain tempo.

       Nostalgia?  Selective memory?  Perhaps, but I can say this with certainty.  Never in all my growing up did I hear my parents’ quarrel.  Never did I hear them discuss money or financial concerns.  We were sheltered from that type of insecurity.  Any stress we experienced was of our own making.  We were very blessed.

Hamlet - Great Words to Live By

Some 40 years ago the English curriculum in grade 12 included William Shakespeare`s Hamlet.  Somehow it seems a shame that most of us didn`t really get all the philosophy of the play until many years later.  Recently I was reading a book on finding one`s inner self and the chapter began with Polonius famous words to his son Laertes.

This above all; to thine own self be true, and it must follow as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.

Perhaps when reading it in the context of soul searching the quote seems to take on more meaning or perhaps I have forgotten the impact on hearing the words for the first time.  In any event I found the quote more powerful than the rest of the chapter.  I kept going back to it and savouring the deeper meaning, almost nodding in agreement as I re-read the words. 

In the lengthening of our years it seems that many of us are searching for more meaning in our lives and part of that search is inward rather than outward.  We begin to ask “ìs this all there is”?  Then we search out answers in various ways one of them being, perhaps, meditation.  The next thing we discover is that we don’t know that much about ourselves.  Have we always been true to ourselves as we work our jobs?  Have we been true to ourselves as we raise our children?  How judgmental have we been with our parents and has it been fair?  What is our passion?  Do we even know?  Have we lost sight of what we loved because we have toiled for 40 years?  Is there still time to grab the brass ring?  Do we want to?  What do we want?

       So I am asking the question, have you been true to thine own self?

A Trove of Books

The pleasures in a book are manifold, everything from simply escaping into another world, discovering a trove of new words, ideas, or history, delving into characters and the twists in personality, and a dozen other diversions.  I distinctly recall the absolute wonder of my first book where I dived into “the olden days” when I opened up the covers of “The Little House in the Big Woods”.  First of all there was the charm of Garth Williams wonderful drawings.  The opening words were simple “Once upon a time, sixty years ago, a little girl lived in the Big Woods of Wisconsin, in a little gray house made of logs.”  I was 9 years old and I was hooked.

       Since then I have read more than 2,000 books and I still open up each book with a tingle of anticipation hoping to dive into something wonderful.  Certainly I am not so easy to please as I was when I was 9 but I would not describe myself as a reading snob either.  I can be as happy with a good mystery as with a historical biography or a new age psychology book as long as the writing is good.  There are few things more frustrating than reading a book where one suddenly discovers that she has been editing the last 3 pages of the book because the grammar or construction was simply too dreadful to endure.  Those books soon find a place in a deep dark corner of the basement, waiting to be sent to a garage sale.

       For many years I suffered from motion sickness and was therefore unable to read while riding in a bus but fortunately by my mid twenties I was able to overcome my sickness and could while away 40 minutes on my ride to and from work.  It’s curious to see how many more people seem to be reading these days than 30 years ago.  In those early days it was mostly women who read while on the bus, although some men did read the paper but today I would say there is an equal number of either sex reading books, often on a mobile device.   I find that rather curious and wonder why that is.  Despite these larger numbers though it is still amazing to me how many people do not read once they are out of school.  I could simply not imagine life without books and Benjamin Franklin’s invention of the lending library is one of the greatest humanitarian acts every founded.

       I’m a book addict and proud of it.

Home Renovations 911

Houston, we have a problem.  Yesterday John finally took the skill saw (or whatever it was) and cut through the floor planking to see what was underneath.  What we have is a crawl space that is sort of stuffed with insulation.  When Mom broke the news to me I was appalled.  I am still appalled.  I cannot wrap my head around the fact that part of my house is not sitting on a foundation of cement.  Cement is like the Rock of Gibraltar to my mind and a home sitting on anything less is, well, less.  That’s the first thing that comes to mind, the second is “what exactly does it mean when there is simply space and then dirt”?

       This big black hole that is underneath the house raises all sorts of potential nightmares for me.  Will a nest of dirt animals find their way under the house and eventually gnaw their way through my floor boards?  What kind of dirt animals are there?  Moles, weasels, badgers, OMG, badgers!  Badgers have been known to bite human legs in half and their claws are mighty enough to claw through wood.  I have a vision of Mom and I waking up with broken legs and a rabid badger ransacking the kitchen cupboards while we helplessly listen from our beds, incapacitated.

       Is the vision of an additional 30 square feet enough to console me for this new knowledge?  Umm, well, let me think.  I’m not sure I can let go of my anxiety but the new potential in this family room does allow me to frolic in my mind.