2012 Countdown with Mother

The conversation with Mom did not go as planned which isn’t surprising since nothing ever seems to work out that way.  My mother just thinks that I am a “good girl” and then she gets tears in her eyes so I hurry to talk about something else.  I had great plans to think hard on my personality but found it boring with the possibility of becoming too time consuming so I let it go.

       How’s that for self analysis? 

       Instead we talked about the end of the year with anticipation since tonight we wind up Downton Abbey Season 2 and look forward to next Sunday’s premier of Season 3.  We are also working out the new diet program which Mom is promising to keep me on track.  She has actually read my book with all the instructions which bodes well as last spring she was simply not on board with reading through all my Weight Watchers’ manuals.  She has already been monitoring my work on the treadmill and has even marched alongside while I did my workout (for about 2 minutes).  The spirit is there even if the body is weak.

       What else did we do yesterday?  Well Mom has been reading her detective novel and even lay in bed most of the morning doing so while I worked away on my writing.  After lunch we watched Clint Eastwood’s latest film “Trouble with the Curve” in which he plays yet another cranky old man.  I said to Mom that the daughter should just do what I do, hit him over the head with a virtual hammer and make him do what she says!  What’s with these giver-uppers anyway?  It’s like on Y&R, Adam must have walked out that door after a brief talk / argument with Chelsea twice per episode over the last 3 months and both of us look at each other and say “who does that”?  Not in this family anyway, we like a good argument and can keep at it for hours.  This walking away when someone doesn’t listen the first time is very ineffective and I say if you are going to argue at least be engaged in the argument, for Pete’s sake!

       Anyway that was the afternoon before I went out to test the weather (which was a lot colder than I anticipated).  I walked around the acreage and looked at the various animal footprints and tried to analyze them (oh, during lunch I was watching Darwin’s Origin of Species so I was all into nature) with poor success.  I saw again those huge claw marks but as they didn’t seem to have a natural start or stop I wondered if they were something besides claws?  I also found a lot of different patches of raised earth and grasses and presumed that I would have new molehills showing up in the spring.  I tried to pull a dead branch out of a forked branch but still no luck – it’s now been hanging there for 2 years.  I think we are going to have to pull the truck around to yank it out.  Back in the house we thought that perhaps tomorrow we would go for a camera walk, batteries charged and ready to take more nature pictures.  After all, tomorrow is another day.

Top picture is me at Bergen, Norway

Evaluations of 2012

Now I have done the countdown and the recap, time to evaluate my personal growth.  What, on a blog?  Well, not really, only in the sense that we can all spend some time in personal contemplation and looking at one’s own personal belief in self and who one really is.  What do I mean?  If you are getting up there in years you should have a sense of who you are – or at least who you have been all these decades but sometimes you need to look in the proverbial mirror.

       Interestingly I was rereading a Leslie Ford novel this morning that was all about Hollywood (by way of murder) and one of the characters talked about how dense the jealousy was in the 10 square miles that was Hollywood.  I stopped to reflect on what I have believed of myself for years, namely that I don’t have a jealous bone in my body.  Then I took a quiet double take and asked myself “is that really true”?  So here I am, laying it bare to all and sundry, I think I actually do have a jealous bone in my body.  I thought about it a little bit more, about jealousy in general because I was uncomfortable with the thought of me in particular.  When one is 20 the world lies before you like so much tundra, ready to cross over for miles and miles but approaching 60 that world has shrunk in considerably from the point of view of Possibilities.  So yes, in a sense I can feel a twinge of jealousy when I hear that some young person has pulled up stakes and moved to New Zealand or Sri Lanka or Ecuador.  Perhaps it isn’t quite jealousy but envy mixed with admiration, in any event sometimes it does feel like a negative sensation which is uncomfortable and not like the me that I thought I was.

       That’s just an example of what we believe in ourselves because we have believed it so long – but at some point have we lost touch with ourselves and who we are or who we want to be?  So over the next couple of days I am going to let my mother psychoanalyze me (that in itself should be interesting as this is very much out of her comfort zone) along with my own self contemplation because naturally I think she is interested in her oldest child’s development!  Some questions to be asked:  Am I loyal?  Am I fair?  Am I honest?  Am I open minded?  These are some of the qualities which I have always believed defined me so it will be interesting to figure out if they are still true.

Recapping 2012

Let’s recap the year – because it’s so much fun for me even if my readers don’t care. 

January – Blog reaches 10,000 hits, grand plans to do dedicated articles which lasted less than a month but caused me to reflect a great deal on philosophy, ideas, and moral complexities.

February – My six word memoir “I continue to learn, evolve, share” was born; the first of my girlfriends retired and I’m inspired to live up to my memoir by learning more, evolving more and sharing my life with friends.

March – Another trip to NYC, first Broadway play “Wicked”; NDP leadership race begins and I participate in the process, reviving my dormant interest in politics.

April – Mother moves in and my life turns upside down.  I learn what it’s like to live with someone after a solitary life of 26 years.  It means being waited on hand and foot and recognizing that I can be as selfish as my father.  It also means that I see my mother anew, I see her aging and yet valiantly continuing to do many of the things she has always done.  I see a mother who is ever balanced, unselfish, diplomatic and true. 

May – Annual long weekend in B.C., missing one of the girls but we still drink our way through countless wineries, shop at all the gardening centres and blissfully enjoy the view from Marie’s balcony.  Rose and I commiserate with our dear friend on the homeward trip as she gets unwelcome news about property lines.  This too shall pass, we say.  And it will.

June – Sun deck project begins; thinking about my next ‘round’ birthday; summer holiday with my mom in the sunshine.  Once again I appreciate my mother as we sip our morning coffee on the deck, as we paint our garden furniture, as family stops by to visit with Mom and say “oh hi to you too Sanne”.

July – Learning the 2-step and surviving Stampede, I am reminded that I normally take this week off because the crowds are beyond belief.  This is the 100^th anniversary of the Stampede and the city is bursting at the seams.

August – Dog days of summer, Retirement 301 and losing steam; watching my great nephew Scott frolic in the yard.

September – First trip to Lake Huron with my sister which was a really wonderful experience and made me wonder why I had never gone there before (and my sister lent me one of her cameras which takes really great pictures, she keeps telling me I CAN afford to buy one). I meet my second great nephew Stanley for the first time. I also gamble for the first time, losing $36 and feeling wretched about being sucked in.  But then we walk along Niagara Falls and I enjoy the beauty for the countless time.

October – Celebrate Mom, full steam ahead on Social Club at work, writing a romance novel but quickly get stalled by other activities.

November – Chester is born with the aid of his grandmother (aka Jeanette the Midwife), great nephew number 3; Wine Tasting and nights out with girlfriends.  I enjoyed walking the Calgary streets at night with Christmas lights everywhere.

December – It was a month of social and charitable activities both at work and at home with Adopt-a-Family, Team Building in Banff, Secret Santas, Cookie Exchanges, and socializing with family and friends.  It was also the month where I did some personal evaluation and decided to make some big changes.  Revelations to come in 2013, stay tuned.

2012 Countdown Begins

I’m assembling my thoughts and trying to realize that 2012 has gone by even faster than 2011.  It is very disconcerting to feel that life is pelting by at an increasingly rapid rate with only a big black hole to look forward to.  That does sound grim but whatever may or may not be “on the other side” from this side it just seems to be a big black hole.  When someone dies there is a hole in the family and even if we believe that they are in heaven, in a better place, or resting for the resurrection, on this side of the veil that space is empty.

       Rather than think about the rolling stone into that pit of nothingness, I will direct my thoughts to what to do on the trip we call life.  It seems to me that at this late stage it is more critical than ever to really enjoy every single minute of every single day because we don’t have that much time left.  I think about the nearly 60 years of my life and wonder “where did it go” and “what have I done with my life” and feel an awful sense of fright.  Then I breathe deeply and think sensibly that to simply enjoy life, learn something new as often as possible (because every day is ideal but is it real?) and just be the best person I can possibly be is what should count.  The hole that I leave behind might be very small indeed but it will still be a hole and I at least want people to smile and be happy when they think about me.

       It is trite to say that life goes by too fast but even though we have heard it a hundred times before we hardly ever do much about it.  The truth is that we are often trapped in our life, in that ever turning cog of routine and unfortunately it is not practical to leave that routine.  For those who take the leap of faith and go with their passion I have great admiration even though I may gasp in dismay “how will they survive”?  Amazingly, they do.  We all have a path we tread and however we may walk it, I surely hope that all are enjoying life as much as possible. 

      

2012 Christmas Holidays

The countryside is quiet over the holidays and once the mad rush to get “home” occurs even the highway is desolate.  Yesterday Mom and I sat having our morning coffee and looked out at the quietness of a true Christmas scene, with heavy snow on the ground, the trees and bushes also laden thickly with white.  Cutting kitty corner across the yard were rabbit prints but otherwise nature was hidden away.  Today I will expect to see the madness begin again, with travellers going back to Calgary after spending time with their families.  But there, for a little while, it is almost as though we are in another world, completely cutoff from “civilization”.  Even television seemed surreal with the channels filled with B Christmas movies and skimpy with news.

Tree at Banff Springs Hotel

       Even having a few days free from work and stress can help a person or a family recharge their batteries and be ready for the next few months, until the next big break. But through all the holidays I wonder how often anyone thought about the “true meaning of Christmas”?  Perhaps in fleeting moments many people did have a quiet thought for Peace on Earth and Goodwill towards Men.  I hope so.

       Reflecting back on the weeks prior to Christmas day I wonder at the frenzy many fall into with their shopping, their parties, their stressing to please only to have it fizzle away in less than 12 hours.  As Mom and I sat there sipping our coffee I looked around the room and felt relief that it was not overdone with decorations.  It was just enough to put a shine on the house but not so much that it would be too much work to take it all down.  Does this mean that I will never have another Christmas tree?  No, I don’t think so, but for now, it was just right.

Christmas Time

Mom and I have a busy day ahead of us since we have junk piled up everywhere, boxes of gift bags, wrapping paper and ribbon, gifts stashed in the office, and heaven only knows what the other junk consists of, but it all means a day of wearing several sweatbands, running up and down the basement stairs and of course getting distracted rather than focusing on one task at a time.  In all of this hustle and bustle we also have to do the tasks that the Games Master (also known as my nephew Christopher) requires of us.  This causes Mom particular stress as it involves writing and she declares that she cannot write, both literally and figuratively speaking.  So this means that I will have to write for both of us, sometime today.

       But there’s no doubting it, I love it.  There’s a lot of talk about stress during the Holiday Season but I don’t feel it unless I am forced into a mall.  Since I am extremely organized about my gift buying that isn’t likely to happen so for me, all’s good.  As I sit here drinking my coffee and typing away Thumper is sniffing at a gift and pulling at the corded ribbons on a gift for my niece.  These are special little moments that I will capture with Mother’s hair – I mean camera.

       Ah, to explain, as we were driving to my sister’s house yesterday we both exclaimed “I forgot my camera” and Mom wondered why it was we always seemed to forget them.  I said it was because she was too busy worrying about her hair and that from now on, instead of thinking about her hair she should automatically say camera.  Mom laughed.  When we got to the house everyone was exclaiming at what a fashionista she was as she had put on the glitz for the party.  Then Charlotte commented on house nice the perm had turned out and Mom looked guiltily at me and then began to talk about Her Camera.  We couldn’t stop laughing.

       Being busy with this type of stuff, cleaning house, getting down to the details, makes me happy.  I don’t stress about things like this, and I don’t stress about buying the perfect gift (ask my brother-in-law).  Our family are not the kind to go overboard with spending, we do our best to find something we will like and if not we can just laugh about it and ask ‘what were you thinking’?  I was speaking with a colleague and I was stunned at the amount of money she typically spends on her family (in the range of $3,000 – just for gifts).  Holy Dinah, I might spend $300 if I am going all out – and that was in the day when I bought for 9 nieces & nephews and 5 siblings, plus parents.  Holy cow, no wonder some people stress out. 

       Thinking about that this morning I reflect that the whole point of this day is to embrace our fellow man and feel the love and joy, with the hope of keeping it throughout the year.  Lest I sound sanctimonious believe me when I say “the hope” as I lecture myself every morning while driving to work with these words “Now, going home, just stay calm, don’t get annoyed by all the idiot drivers out there, just stay calm, stay in the right hand lane and just keep the pace, no speeding or losing patience.”  I am perfectly committed to that cause until some maniac makes it impossible for me to keep my resolve.  Let me not digress, instead, let me wish my friends, family and readers a very Merry Christmas.

The Journey Thus Far

I was reviewing the beginning of this year and all my bright ideas for the monthly “theme” and December was the recap month (of course).  2012 has been a little off kilter for me with my mother moving in with me as well as me holding back on my travel plans.  It seems as though many projects stalled without much in the way of explanation.  Except, I am tired.

       Yesterday morning I ran into one of my colleagues on the street corner and he was grinning ear from ear.  I gave him a big hug and asked him how he was feeling about this being his last week before retirement although it was quite obvious that he was happy as a lark.  How I envy him although both of us realize that when we say our final goodbyes we know that it will end our social life as we know it.  When I think of retirement the biggest reason for it is the end of commuting, getting up at 4 in the morning and feeling as though there is no life outside of work.  I guess that’s 3 things however work itself is not the problem.  I enjoy my boss, my work, my team and the events of the day.  But frequently I find myself saying “I’m tired” so I know it’s approaching that time when I need to stop doing what I am doing and find something else.

       The journey thus far?  Well, it is a journey and as I have written several times this year, we are the unsung heroes of our country by simply getting up every morning and trucking it off to work regardless of what the job may be.  We even have our theme song courtesy of Dolly Parton – Working 9 to 5 . . . hey there’s something out of whack with those numbers?

My Little Cherie

Over the last couple of days I have noticed my cat Cherie has not been active, he’s been hiding in corners and essentially not being himself.  This morning he let out several big meows and since he is the non-verbal cat I knew there was something very wrong.  A call and a drive to the vet’s confirmed my fears, Urinary Tract Infection.  As I left my little fellow with the doctor I found myself covered with nearly as much fur as my baby boy, which indicates that Cherie is much more stressed than I am.  I’ve been busy writing all morning but every once in a while I stop and think “what’s the little guy doing now” or “what is he thinking, have I abandoned him again”?

       This little boy was supposed to go to a home 8 weeks after he was born but one night with the scary Michelle and her psycho cat brought him back to me.  The morning Michelle handed him back to me his eyes were round and frightened but when he saw me his little paws stretched out and he meowed “Mama” in desperation.  He clung to me for the rest of the day and since then he has been my baby.  I have felt dreadful putting him through that trauma (believe me, I am not exaggerating) and since he’s never been away from home in the last 9 years this is a scary time for the little fellow.

       Poor little guy, I hope the operation goes well and he will be home with me tomorrow night.

My boy's best side.

All I Want for Christmas -- is Peace on Earth

Thinking about my high school experience can make me smile, it makes me wonder about myself and it creates a lot of curiosity about my fellow classmates.  Unless I was crushing on some boy my interest in my classmates was pretty limited to those in my immediate circle.  I never have been a very gossipy type of person (all evidence to the contrary?) and if one really studies a teenager you know that they are the most self-centred of creatures.  High school journals are filled with the I-word and the unsaid belief that the world completely revolves around the I. 

       I had begun this article yesterday morning before the shocking tragedy that occurred in Connecticut yesterday and so my focus changes.

I just feel like I want to send up a prayer message to the sweet, innocent young children and the dedicated teachers who were killed by a lunatic.  My eyes are filling up with tears as I think about these people who will not get to fulfill their, potential, hopes, dreams and live their lives to the fullest.  Five years old, my heart breaks for these babies who won’t even go to Grade One.  Six, Seven, Eight, all the recesses, the agony over tests, the excitement of learning something new in gym class, of mastering the hurdles, singing Mariah Carey’s “All I Want For Christmas . . . Is You”.  Oh my goodness but that makes me want to cry!

       School dances, school crushes, American history including the Revolution and learning all about that little number The U.S. Constitution and the 2^nd amendment’s right to bear arms.  These little ones certainly know all about the consequences of that amendment. The original purpose of the amendment was to protect you and your society, small as it was but today it is apparently to protect one’s self from society.  But these children were too young to know such fine nuances of logic, tongue in cheek.

       I’m not forgetting the adults who were also killed, untimely, cruel deaths for people who have dedicated their careers to educating and caring for children.  With the rest of the sane world I am utterly sick with grief for these incomprehensible murders.

Organizing a Reunion, or a Trip to Banff

It’s that time of year where I look anxiously towards clearing my calendar so I can get on with the next project.  This winter I took on a few extra “mini projects” at work which have really taken up a lot more time than I anticipated so I really feel as though I am behind the eight ball now.  It’s pretty sad when a person actually starts to hope for Christmas to be over!

       Looming ahead of me is the big 60^th Birthday Bash for my high school class.  I need to make some time to start telephoning classmates to get confirmation on their plans.  That’s always the biggest challenge with whatever event is coming up, getting commitment.  When it comes to buying and preparing food, no problem.  Arranging events, music, space, no problem, I’ve got it covered someway.  But ensuring that people show up, that’s a huge challenge.  Unless you say the magic words “we are going to Banff” because for some reason when that rumours flies around in our office suddenly there are people showing up in my office that I’ve never heard of before. 

“I worked for your team.” 

“Really, when?”

“In 2007, I tied Torger’s shoelaces once.” 

“Really, how tall was Torger?” 

“He was a 6 foot Norwegian.” 

“Ah, well nice try but no cigar, sweetheart.” 

I love it when I can say stuff like that.  Yeah, people come out of the woodwork when you go to Banff.  Coming to Nanton, well that’s a different kettle of fish!

Holding It Together

.Now that sounds like I am coming apart, that my nerves might be frayed, or that there is A Situation going on.  In a way, there is a situation going on; it’s called holding your water while you wait another 4 hours before you get an ultrasound test.  This situation has been on my mind for more than 24 hours because the last time I went for this test it did not happen due to forces beyond my control.  So here I sit, fasting, with a glass of water before me, a dry mouth and a hesitancy to drink the water due to the dread of feeling as though I might explode.  Can you imagine being in crisis mode while confined to a train cabin and no washroom in sight?

       Okay, I’ve taken my first sip of water, my throat is still parched but so far, no extra niggling desire to “go”.  I’m looking around my home office and I see a pile of papers and once again I think about the night time breeding quality of paper.  How does it grow seemingly overnight?  I’m wondering about the nightmarish dreams I’ve had 4 days in a row.  What’s up with that?  I haven’t watched Breaking Bad or The Walking Dead so why am I having dreams about drugs and dead people?  Minimal distraction with the pondering because, yes, the niggling is getting more intense and it’s not even 4 a.m. yet.  I’m afraid to even sit on the commode because at this stage in my life my control is not what it used to be.

       Too much information?  If you’ve ever read “Maxine” you will understand that after a certain age no topic is off limits.  I’ll  upgrade my status tomorrow.

Work Life Balance

We often hear the jargon about "work-life balance" yet when we hear the statistics we find that Canadians tend to work harder than ever.  I recall my grade 8 teacher telling the class that by the time we students were out in the workforce we would likely have a 4 day work week.  Some 45 years later I’m still waiting for that work week.  The truth is that there are multiple factors at play but the biggest factor is our instable global economy.  An unscientific study of economic growth shows that from the end of World War II up to the mid 1970’s the economy in the western world was growing at a moderate rate.  From the mid 70’s to the early 80’s the economy grew rapidly, to such an extent that we saw record interest rates of almost 30%.  The mid 1980’s saw a moderate recession, and by the mid 1990’s we saw a full blown recession.  The early 21^st century saw a sudden boom followed by the infamous crash of 2007.  Many place the crash in 2008 but in 2007 we saw the crash of some of the biggest bank mutual funds crash because foreign banks were already taking the hit.  America was just better at covering up the defaults.

       What does this mean?  The average individual takes the biggest hit because they are vulnerable in income, savings, job security, mortgage rates and consumer buying power.  A number of factors that once protected the individual had been removed.  Examples include allowing pharmaceutical companies extended patent rights which have caused prescription drug prices to skyrocket.  Labour Standard Boards no longer protect the employee; instead they bully the employee with comments such as “be happy you have a job”.  Large retail chains are allowed to employ workers at minimal hours for minimum wages so that they don’t have to pay benefits or their fair share of taxes.           Banks have been allowed to self-govern and we know where that has got America. 

       The political will seems to have strayed very far from the idealistic concept of democracy which allows the population to be equal or access to the same opportunities.  It’s very difficult to be equal when everyone is not on the same playing field.  In a nutshell, the world is not fair and it seems to be getting worse, rather than better.  So much for what my teacher foresaw!

Shopping with Mother

Shopping with my mother can be fun and it can be a pain in the gazoo.  She likes grocery shopping but if we go beyond that the margin of fun narrows considerably and once we get into Christmas stuff or knick knacks its game over for me.  When I got home we’d been gone for 3 hours or so and while I plugged my ears and bought what I liked I still called up my sister and asked for a silver bullet.  I’m not sure if I was going to put myself or Mom out of our misery.  Well, I’m just kidding (maybe) about the misery since I’m a grown woman and can do what I want but since I grew up respecting my mother it’s very difficult to ignore her. 

       I’m pretty sure that I am not a shopaholic because I don’t go shopping every weekend and quite often I actually don’t enjoy shopping whether it’s for groceries, clothes or something else.  But when I get it into my head that I want to go on a shopping spree, especially around Christmas time, I don’t want to feel guilty about looking!  Contrary to my mother’s opinion, I do not buy everything that I fancy.  If I pick up something shiny it’s because it’s shiny, pretty and I want to look at it.  I’m not going to wear it.  This morning I shooed her over to the baking pans because she fell in love with an aluminum pan a couple of weeks ago and I thought she might like a second one (but mostly it was to get her away from me).  Then I wandered around the store trying to find her again but she had strayed over to the other pots and pans.  Huh, I caught her looking at something.  Did she want it, could I get her to buy it?  No.  Once caught she wouldn’t look at anything again.

       Then we finally ended up in the bulk candy store where I had some more success with her.  She loves licorice so we headed to the licorice bins, but her favorite salty ones were not in.  Instead we bought the Licorice Allsorts but we struggled with the lid of the container,  We pulled it apart and hand picked (I blush to confess it) our favorites.  I muttered as I put the lid back on “why isn’t this one working like the others?”  As we looked at the other bins I suddenly realized we had not been using the actually handle and lever – instead Mom had yanked off the whole blooming top and I was reminded of the time she threw the ball shaped calculator on the floor in Staples.  That time we laughed so hard we disgraced ourselves and we have not been back in the store since.  This time we just giggled because we were both completely stupid.

       Having finished up at this mall we headed over to the fashion district where I only ran slightly amok in the shoe section.  I tried to buy a pair for Mom but she kept saying she was happy with her little polka dot slippers even though her feet were freezing cold and they look more like bedroom slippers than shoes.  I couldn’t get her to sit down and as I was afraid the cashier would think I was abusing my mother if I held her down with my legs I thought we should go.  We had a light moment as we admired the hoar frost on the bushes were the car was parked and I said I loved that she was crippled with arthritis so we could use her handicapped parking card to get a good spot in front of the next store which made her happy but made me feel like a ghoul. 

       When I went to get a certain size pant she said she was afraid it wouldn’t fit me and I asked, “you mean they are too big?” she smiled, shook her head and I squeaked out “this is my size, you think my ass looks bigger than this?” and she had the gall to say yes.  I almost trembled when I went into the change room, I’m not sure if it was fear that she was right or anger that she had so insulted my ass.  I was prepared to buy the damn pants even if they didn’t fit just to prove her wrong but mercifully they fit (and I wasn’t even wearing my spanx) so my anxiety was over.

       Just to punish Mom we then went over to M&M and I bought frozen food and made her eat it for lunch.  Lucky for her, she liked it. 

A Night Out on the Town

I love romantic comedies set in New York City where girlfriends go out for dinner or drinks, walk home to their apartments and then go to work the next day.  I find that exotic because it is not remotely like my life.  My friends and I live in suburbia and if we did go out for dinner we’d drive our cars because that’s what you do in suburbia.  Not to mention having to deal with snowy conditions and icy sidewalks if you did find a place in your neighbourhood where you could hang out. 

       But now I have a couple of girlfriends who live downtown and I only have to overcome my dread of driving downtown in the dark to start experiencing the ambience of night life in my old age.  The world better look out because there are band of sisters coming out who are of a certain age and are just out for a good time.  Society needs to recognize that mature women of a certain age have a disposable income and we want to put it towards a fun time.  I’ve thought about creating a Girlfriends’ Bar or an Old Girls Club but the truth is that women are much more inclusive than men.  Even though we are no longer on the prowl for a good man (because we realize at last that there is no such animal) we don’t like to hurt their feelings and say you can’t come in.  While we are nice like that we don’t find men folks reciprocating at all.  We are still the Invisible Ones when we go out anywhere for an evening so perhaps an exclusive clubs is necessary to cushion our delicate middle aged egos from being passed over during the cocktail hour.

       I was out on the town the other night and had a fantastic time with a girlfriend.  I felt as though we were in one of those romantic comedies (sans the romance) as we walked along the brightly lit sidewalk to our club where Of All Things That I Ever Wanted to Do, we met, quite by accident, people we knew.  It was like a dream come true movie sequence as we chatted with a colleague who just happened to be at the club.  After dinner we jaywalked (something I never do) across the street to the wine shop where we were having our tasting evening.  How much fun to think of us dashing across the street (okay, we were cautiously waiting for cars to stop and let us stroll across) just like Carrie whats-her-name in NYC.  Okay we weren’t wearing Jimmy Choos, we had on winter boots and our scarves were muffling our faces, but it felt the same.  We bustled past the fragrance of spices and deli supplies to reach the really exclusive little wine shop in the back.  How charming to see that we were not the first but among the fashionably last to arrive and then to be greeted with a champagne glass of really good rosé.  There were no awkward moments; instead we blended perfectly into the group anticipating an evening of experiencing new wines.

       Afterwards we walked through the dark streets giggling, slightly tipsy from the wine but still able to walk a straight line, talking about the wines and Italy.  I didn’t even think until later that “hey, we never once talked about work” and wasn’t that great? 

       And to all my guy friends, I know there are some good men out there.  J