Caring for Elderly Parents

I still have a hard time thinking about my mother as “elderly”.  Last night I was listening to her fussing about the kitchen and it was just like I was back in Winnipeg on a Monday night.  She still has a lot of energy although it only comes in spurts (much like myself).  But I am reminded of the commercial about hearing loss and how the old dad is missing out on the conversations because of his deafness.  While watching television (even on loud) Mom is not getting the jokes nor the sequence of events and I realize that she is seriously deaf.  Talking one on one she must be reading our lips to understand us.  Interesting how she has fooled me for how long?

       So yesterday I arranged for an appointment with a hearing loss clinic and when I came home with the news she was all hesitant and telling me she couldn’t afford an aid.  That’s because I told her a colleague had paid $7,000 for her husband’s hearing aid.  Naturally she is freaked out.  But the good news (sort of) is that at this clinic the starting range is $1,800 and they also advised their is some Seniors’ allowance through Alberta Health Care which would reduce the cost to about $1,200.  Still very pricy if you don’t have the money but at least it isn’t $7,000.  Luckily I have a bonus coming up.

       And of course, me being me, I asked our payroll department if I could add my mother on as a dependent.  You can guess what the answer was.  Curiously enough, the advisor told me that I was by no means the first person to ask this question which indicates to me that there are many of us caring for our parents.  And that makes me very glad.  You might find this surprising but remember that I am first generation immigrant so I never saw my parents caring for their own parents as they were back in Denmark.  So all of this is new to me.

       It’s only been two weeks but now I realize what a responsibility it is to care for one’s parents while still allowing them their dignity.  It’s important to respect one’s parents and allow them autonomy.  But I cannot let my mother go around not hearing things, what if a robber should enter the house unbeknownst to her.  I shudder to think what could happen.