Reality, back to earth

So here I am, back to reality and into snow.  How can we be at the end of April and still have snow?  But let's not complain when we have the opportunity to take a tropical vacation since many people don't.

 

The survey on my station today was whether I could live on $1.50 per day for 5 days (which is apparently what Ben Afflect proposes to do as part of an awareness of poverty campaign)

People can do it if they set their minds to it but naturally it would mean sacrificing many things we take for granted these days.  Like a cup of coffee at Tim Horton's, a bought lunch rather than a brown bag lunch (because we are too lazy to make a peanut butter and jam sandwich), picking up a bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken rather than opening a can of beans (mind you, I don't think a can of beans is very cheap anymore).  I can remember when you could get 5 packs of Kraft Dinner for a dollar.  Then it went down to 3.  Now one pack costs, I don't know, $2.00 maybe?  (it was never my choice of comfort food).

 

The reality is that we are expensive people these days, we do like to take the easy way out by either eating out a lot or buying a lot of prepackaged, processed food.

 

But here is another side of the topic - how many people do live a very narrow line between barely making it and dipping into the poverty line?  More than you might think, and many are your friends, relatives or neighbours.  I have a huge concern for the way our government bodies are treating employees in this decade.  More and more frequently government is involving themselves in union disputes and declaring almost every type of union job "an essential service" and rapidly legislating them back to work.  Currently we have prison guards striking in Edmonton (and now rapidly moving elsewhere in the province) due to an individual getting fired for speaking out about unsafe conditions in the workplace.  How many others are concerned about the way the government is / will handle these types of situations?  It comes perilously close to dictatorship when workers can no longer strike for fair conditions, fair wages, etc.  And to be even more outrageous, these tyranical politicians gobble at the trough to an extent that would put the Sheriff of Nottingham to shame.

 

Really very worrisome.

Know Your City

So here is my experience when travelling anywhere in the world - no one knows their own city.  Whenever I have had occasion to ask for directions, for a bus route, or something like that the sales clerks in the various stores never, ever, know what bus to take.  I believe this is also correct in Canada.  If you ask them what the population of their city is, rarely do they know.  They have never thought about it.  

As I observed folks getting on the city bus this morning I wondered if these were people on vacation, if they were "guests" and from their my thoughts morphed to "what is the meaning of life"?  People were stopping at the Pearl Harbour Memorial Centre but even more were stopping at the mall. There is so much at the mall and I wondered, why do we buy so much stuff? We decorate our homes, we buy toys of every kind, we buy clothes, we buy, buy, buy.  Is it really retail therapy, does buying make us feel good?  Do we go to the mall to avoid our real life? Our thoughts? Our relatives?

Just a little blip of wondering while I enjoyed my vacation.  Watching the boats in the bay outside our condo, wondering about the owners' lives - it must be amazing to live in Hawaii.

Vacation - it's wonderful.

Further Adventures in Hawaii

Observations about Americans - they don't like to walk.  Their concept of "far" is walking more than 3 blocks.  They love to eat.  A :lunch" portion is the size of Manhattan.  I would hate to see what the regular size portion is like.  And they wonder why they have an obesity problem in the United States?  They don't have a problem with shysters.  Every corner on the Waikiki strip has tour hucksters who try to con you into something that "isn't a time share" (but it is).  

Americans are very friendly towards their "guests" or tourists as we Canadians call ourselves.  They are much better at being servers than Canadians.  Whether they are a cashier, waitress, concierge, if they are in the service industry they are remarkably friendly and helpful.  In Canada those who expedite or serve us are reluctant, arrogant and basically have the attitude that they are as good as the customer.  Yes, they are, but at the moment when I am the customer and you are the service person, you ought to give me good service, with a smile.  I don't want to see a sour face or reluctance.  Americans are good at covering up that side.  Kudos to them.

And I must apologies, I thought Americans didn't read because there are no bookstores in the malls.  But today we finally found one!  Persistence.  6 cities and we finally found one.

Where Would I Live?

Day Five in Honolulu

This morning I asked myself the question, where would you live if you could choose a place without any consideration for cost or politics?  The reason for the question arose out of my sense of smell.  It seems to me that tropical, humid, beach front places have a musty kind of smell, almost like fish.  I don't know if that is correct but it certainly wouldn't be pleasant to have type of concern in one's home.  One of the things I learned about Hawaii is that there are no snakes here and the bugs are all benign unless you are allergic to them (i.e. scorpions & spiders are not dangerous).  So far I have not seen anything creepy here; as I recall I was startled in Cuba by the lizards crawling all over the place!

Sitting here on the balcony in Honolulu, surf noises aside, it is similar to being in San Francisco or NYC.  Shops, cars, restaurants . . . and guests.  That is another thing I learned, in Hawaii we are not called tourists, we are guests.   That is heartwarming.

Now the birds have flown on to the table to say good morning, where's the breakfast?  I just love that, being so unafraid of humans and so trusting.  I am sure that if this was my home I would not find it charming to have birds in my food!  The difference between vacation layback and day to day living may be a sharp contrast for some of us.

The answer to my question - Denmark.

Hawaiian Island Tour

Tours are always interesting but when you have a guide with a wonderful sense of humour your trip becomes golden.  Such was the trip we experienced today.  "Cousin James" was delightful and knowledgeable and to top it off he had a chuckle that was irresistible.  I read James Michener's novel "Hawaii" many, many years ago and found it very interesting but I must admit there is still a lot of the history of the island that is unfamiliar to me.  It's fascinating to say the least.

And let's not neglect that absolute gorgeousness of this island.  There are so many different kinds of trees that it boggles the mind.  Who knew there were so many different kinds of palm trees?  Who knew that pineapples are plants (and not grown on trees)?  Who knew that agriculture on Oahu has declined to the point of destroying the sugar cane industry?  Who knew an 8 foot cane of sugar produces only 1 tablespoon of sugar?  I learned so much in 8 hours that was interesting, amusing and fun.  

And we haven't even touched on the Hollywood aspect.  We saw the locations for Lost, 50 First Dates, Gilligan's Island, Magnum P.I., Hawaii 5-0, and Jurassic Park, to name a few.  Cool.  

And who knew that pineapple ice cream tasted so good?  

Have I mentioned how much I love tropical vacations?  Even when it rains, it's fun!

Straight from the Heart

I'm having trouble opening up Word this morning so I will write this directly into the blogspot - my readers will have to suffer through the typos and grammar faux pas!

What can I say about Hawaii except that it is similar to any tropical escape; one's cares seem to disappear for the time being.  We find ourselves questioning why we Westerners have so much anxiety and stress about feeling secure when in fact we have so much more than the "locals" (wherever we stay).  Perhaps because we come from northern climates where we must have food and fuel for the cold winter months we develop a cultural history of  "responsibility" or forethought of what may come.  Today we still worry about what may come even though there may be a social safety net to catch us (well, not really, but "in theory").  In any event, for the few days we are on vacation, particularly when it is a tropical escape, we lose our concern and relax.  It is wonderful.

Honolulu is, of course, a very commercial city; no different from NYC, San Francisco or any other American city.  Macy's, Tiffany's, Ralph Lauren - in fact all of Fifth Avenue is alive and well on this tropical isle.

The breezes are pleasant and fool us into thinking the sun is not so sharp; but still no sunburn.  Yet.  Just feeling strong and energetic.  Love that Vitamin D.

Honolulu and High Fashion

Second day on vacation and while I am thoroughly enjoying the tropics here are some observations.  There is no escaping shopping when you are in an American city.  Fifth Avenue is not just located in NYC, it's in San Francisco, Seattle, Dallas, Miami & Honolulu - to name a few of the cities that I've personally witnessed the moves!

There are also some observations about people living in paradise like conditions  - they appear to be very laid back and happy. Life has a very different pace when lived in perfect surroundings.  Even though people may be living on the economic edge as they likely are when they exist by working on a marketing booth they seem to simply be happy, welcoming and very polite. They have, in general, a very customer friendly attitude which is lacking in Canada.  I write this despite having an incident at the market that was quite disturbing.  I almost made the sales person cry.  She kept asking me how much I would offer and I was adamant that $25 was it.  She kept trying to push the price higher and I said no, that's okay so finally she wrapped it up and asked for The $25 but when I have her the money she wanted tax money and I said no, that 'snot the deal, it was $25 or we can cancel the deal  But tax, tax, tax and I said no, no, no. Finally I gave her an extra dollar and she said go, go, go.  And I still think I paid too much.

Its easier to shop at Macy's.

Suitcases, Suitcases . . . What to Pack?

Every trip I decide “next time I will travel lighter” and when the next time arrives I still worry in case I need to have a fancy dress, high heels, and all the time I know in my heart I am going to wear jeans the whole trip!  This time is different, one suitcase, half filled.  That’s the goal.  No shopping.  then Mother offered me her much larger suitcase and because it seemed empty . . . I filled it up some more!

       Ah, the best laid plans . . . but truly, I plan on being a sight seeing fool.     

 

       And at night I fall into a restless sleep that finds me fighting the seas and I wake up thinking “but I am flying, not sailing”.  My subconscious is fearful of being out in the middle of the Pacific Ocean.  Perhaps this is the reason why I am so reluctant to take a cruise, I am just not comfortable being on an island, away from the mainland.  I might come from a seafaring nation but this girl has been inland as on the prairies for the better part of her life and somehow the idea of being on an island for 10 days is a little nerve rattling.

       My father’s daughter is borrowing trouble.

Hawaii Here I Come

Annette Funicello passed away last week but I still remember the Beach Blanket movies where I first was introduced to surfing.  Between Annette and Sandra Dee I followed the popular 60’s teenage trend to long for surfing.  I wanted to go to Hawaii or California and “catch a wave”.  Well, the years have rolled by and I must admit even if my body was up to catching a wave my psyche is not.

       In my 20’s I read James Michener’s epic “Hawaii” and a whole new fascination of the island began.  Living in the rather harsh and uninteresting climate of Canada I longed to see palm trees, jungle, surf and sand.  I was 55 before I saw my first tropical island, Cuba.  Since then I have been to Mexico and Ecuador but at long last I find myself counting down 4 more sleeps until I land in Honolulu.  I am thrilled at the thought of getting off the plane and receiving my lei and will actually be shattered if the custom no longer exists.

       The unknown is the exotic; the familiar becomes humdrum.

       Even as I anticipate I dread disappointment.   I remind myself, be open hearted, expect little and everything will surprise you.

Marching Onward

Even while we ensure the pressure of work, weather, and what-not we usually have something to look forward to be it a vacation, an anniversary, or some other type of event.  Currently I am working with several colleagues who are about to take the big leap into Retirement and in one sense I envy them but in another I am filled with trepidation on their behalf.  For the men I feel particularly concerned because as I have read and heard numerous times they are the least prepared for the isolation that comes with retirement.  For many men they have so completely identified themselves with their job that there is nothing solid for them to fall back on in retirement. 

       I have noticed that frequently when one has colleagues as friends if you leave the company within a year that friendship will have withered and died.  Rare indeed are the colleague-friends who have enough in common to continue on with that friendship.  In that regard I find myself truly blessed and I think many women also experience the same continued friendship.  For men, unless they make a conscious effort, this rarely happens.  While they are working, yes, they “network”, but once the purpose of networking disappears there is little in common to continue the relationship.  I think this is particularly well drawn in the film “About Schmidt” and I am aware of a few men who took this as a wake up call and began reinventing themselves.  Kudos to them.

       I was catching up with an old friend yesterday on the C-train and we shared some more fact gathering on retirement.  It is interesting that despite researching this subject for more than 8 years I am constantly surprised to discover new ‘facts’ or pieces that I had not yet considered.  In this case we were talking about our credit ratings, something I had not really considered as part of The Plan.  Another item, as we get older we need to be sure that our wills, personal directives and power of attorney are updated since things will change at a rapid pace in our twilight years.  I feel that one ought to have a Guideline Notebook with things to check up on annually because who can keep it all straight from year to year?

       And on this note, I will end with heartfelt relief that they have changed Katherine Chancellor’s storyline from Alzheimer’s to a brain tumour – I’m just not sure I could have dealt with the agony of seeing Kay decline on TV.  I am still not completely over the book “Still Alice”.  J

Spring is in the Air

March 21^st comes around and we love to hear the words ‘spring is in the air’ and yet this winter seems to be hanging on with a vengeance.  Across the country we are suffering from snow or ice storms with nary a tulip anywhere.  For those of us who simply hang in there, staying in the country and enduring the weather, we may find ourselves getting down into the doldrums or even into a depression.  It is amazing how the weather can affect our sense of well being.  A bright sunny day will find us smiling and saying good morning to everyone we meet but a grey and miserable day will find us in much the same mood.  In my part of the country many people are also affected by our Chinook winds which can cause them terrible migraine headaches.  I’ve had a few of those myself.

       So what are some of the solutions we use to help cope with weather blues?  Closing the blinds and curling up with a good book?  Baking a cake and eating half of it before anyone else arrives to enjoy it?  Scrubbing the house clean from top to bottom?  Railing against fate?  Braving the elements and walking off the cobwebs of the mind?  One, none, or all of the above?  Most humans have an amazing coping system for whatever comes upon them and after it is all over we ask ourselves, how did I manage to get through that?

       This morning I am looking out my window and the sun is shining brightly, the wind has picked up and although it is balmy now the forecast is calling for a spring blizzard with 25 centimeters of snow.  In the middle of April.  That’s life in Canada but somehow I will manage to get through the depressing reality and only look wistfully once or twice at the optimistic lawn furniture being covered with snow.

       C’est la vie.

One, Two, Three . . . Go

Now I have had it.  Again.

       I am not a smoker, never have been, but I am sick and tired of the way the new moral majority has taken to ostracizing smokers.  Shame on you.  This morning there was a poll that indicated that 68% were in favour of banning smoking in the outdoors. Period.  Are you kidding me?  At what point will people stop to think about what they are doing to smokers?  How righteous do they think they are by segregating a group of people because of something they do?

       I am watching Downton Abbey and I see how zealously Isabel Crawley is trying to help prostitutes recover their self respect.  I am sure that the folks watching this program are sympathetic to Ethel’s plight (if not, shame on you).  If one can be sympathetic to a fallen woman then why can one not have compassion for those who have fallen into the bad habit of smoking?  Are you really going to make me believe that smokers are irritating you to the extent that you don’t want them smoking in a park? 

       Well let me get on the band wagon then.  I want to put duct tape on teenage kids who get on the C-train at Heritage and yells, scream, giggle, shout and curse at one another for the next 6 stops.  My nerves cannot take it.  I am pretty sure that there are others on the train who feel the same way.   I hear a sigh and see rolling or squinting eyes as we come to the stop.  Better yet, let’s bring the strap back into the schools and teach these hooligans a lesson.

       You see what I mean?  It only takes one nutbar to start a whole thing going.  Politically it’s cool to harass smokers.  I think it’s weak and barbaric.  If you want to stop smoking don’t be such a namby pampy hypocrite.  Stop the manufacturers from putting chemicals in the tobacco which causes nicotine addiction.  Let’s go after those big tax paying companies, shall we?  Right, I didn’t think so.

       If we keep this up we are going to next see them charging extra for smokers in the hospitals.  If you can’t see what is happening here then I don’t know what else I can say, except that eventually something that you are doing may turn on you.  Be careful what you wish for.  And you might also think a little bit about our Christian values.       

He who is without sin . . .

Women in the 21st Century

What is woman’s role in the 21^st century?

Until the 20^th century there had never really been a question regarding what women’s role should be.  They were designed as mothers, as keepers of the hearth and any deviation from that path was merely an accident.  Untold millions of women through the ages have accepted their role as mothers, wives, daughters and little more.  At least that is how it appeared on the surface .

       With the advent of universal education, women’s suffrage and two world wars ordinary women in the Western world were participating actively in society for the first time.  Prior to the 20^th century few women made a mark in the world except by way of notoriety, an accident of birth or marriage.  There were a handful of women authors, educators and scientists in the previous centuries but by1900 doors opened up to women in myriad ways.  Women were no longer confined to their homes, the kitchen or the cradle.

       In the first half of the 20^th century women gained the vote.  They gained the right to manage their own finances, independent of their husbands.  They were allowed to gain a university education and were admitted to medical, engineering and law schools in increasing numbers.  Women moved from jobs as servants to jobs in industry which increased their independence.  Highly educated women still struggled in the first half of the century to gain entry in male dominated professions particularly within medicine, law, banking and scientific research.  The second half saw increasing strides for women in all areas but most notably in politics and media celebrity.

       The question now is how will society in the 21^st century change and will women’s role correspondingly change?  Hillary Clinton spoke recently at the Women of the World summit and said that women’s rights are the unfinished business of the 21^st century.  One hundred years ago we were on the brink of the first world war and women still wore full length dresses while wearing trousers was almost unheard of.  Believe it or not women today are still given a dress code in the work place while there is no code for a man in the same job.  A woman is an administrator while a man doing the same job is an analyst.  Needless to say he also is paid more than the woman while she generally has a great output of work.

       Society is ever more complex but how often do we hear someone ask a new father “will you go back to work”?

Adios Mother

The house will seem very strange tonight when I get home from work since my mother will be gone on her vacation.  Ten days to fend for myself, no more suppers ready and waiting when I get home, no companionship while watching television, no encouragement to do my exercise.  How easy it is to become dependent on someone!

       More important is how strange that prior to my mother moving in I did not realize how alone I was.  In studying up on my retirement plans there has been emphasis on the social aspect when going into retirement.  All along I have been concerned about leaving the social circle within my work environment without giving any thought to my current circumstances on the home front.  Sometimes things will be staring you in the face but you still don’t see it.

       Today I sit here thinking about taking people for granted which is a phrase we hear often yet how often do we ignore the truth.  Last night I gave my mother a big hug because I wouldn’t wake her up at the ungodly hour of 4 a.m. to say goodbye.  This morning I feel like going into her room and just hugging her anyway but of course I don’t want to give her a heart attack either!

       Take a mental check of the people around you and ask yourself if you have told them how much they mean to you.  Then tell them again.  It means the world to them to hear even the tiniest word of appreciation.  You know it’s true because you know how much you smile when someone says “good on you” or “you rock”.  So go out there today and make someone smile.

Stem Cell Research

An opinion poll this morning gave 5 possible answers regarding stem cell research with the information that Canada allows research on discarded human embryos (for in vitro) but will not allow embryos made for the purpose.  Right away one has to ask the question – whose to stop someone from cheating on that criterion (that was my thought as I read the multiple choice answers).  I was surprised that Canada does allow research on embryos but it’s not a topic that I am familiar with.  I had thought that stem cell research was being done on placenta only.

       I look at it this way – once you start experimenting on humans you have gone too far because the fact is that the moment you step over that threshold you have desensitized research.  What real difference is there between an in vitro embryo and one in the womb if it is alive?  There’s danger in going too far with human experimenting and putting a label on it called “in the name of science” does not stop it from being evil.

       When I was barely 16 years old I read a book called “Hitler’s Ovens” (also published under the title “Five Chimneys”) and in it the author Olga Lengyel wrote about her imprisonment in Auschwitz.  She was a doctor and was forced to work with Dr. Mengele.  She documented some of the experiments he did on women and children.  Needless to say this book had an incredible impact on me.

       I believe in science, I believe in research but I believe in humanity more.

The Price of Milk

I have inherited my father’s inability to tolerate lineups.  My father was wont to say “I’m going to faint” when it looked like he might have to be in a lineup.  As a result my parents rarely went out to the movies except if it was a drive-in.  My father would go into a different store or wait in the car when my mother went grocery shopping, at least when it came to standing at the cash.  The older I get the more I resemble my father in this inability.  But at a price.      

       The other day I went to the grocery store to get some water and milk.  2 tills were open and both had lineups.  I thought “I can do this” but I was the 5^th customer in line and after 3 minutes there was still no movement from the first customer, who only had 3 items.  Something was critically wrong and I felt my adrenaline pumping.  The anxiety adrenaline.  I was out of there in a flash.  No milk for me that day.

       The next day company was coming so I thought I would simply go to the gas station grocery store and pick up a bottle of milk and one of cream.  I handed the cashier a $20 and got back a 5 and 2 toonies.  Gulp.  A bottle of milk and cream cost me $11.00.  Seriously.

       That’s the price when you don’t want to stand in a lineup. 

       I nearly fainted.