Clods

Many, many years ago I was a faithful reader of Ann Landers and on one particular day she wrote a response that included the term “insensitive clod”. I thought it was extremely appropriate in the circumstances and have used it many times as the need arose. It just has a certain cutting edge to it that works much better than any curse word. The other day I discovered another sort of clod, the uncouth clod. This is what happened.

As always I was extremely early for my medical appointment, so much so that the doors were not even opened yet so I sat in my car just outside the doors and waited. As it got closer to 8:30 a couple arrived and stood in front of the door. Then a third person arrived and I thought I better get outside and join the lineup. As I did so a fourth person arrived and then a fifth. There were 3 men and 3 women including myself now waiting. The doors opened. Three men streamed in, the third one literally, and I mean literally, ran in front of me. Uncouth clods, that is what I thought as I got my ticket and stared at them sitting in a row. They looked smug like they had won the lottery rather than just beating out three women going in for blood work.

As I sat there for the next 45 minutes awaiting my turn I puzzled about the lack of chivalry in this small town. One would think that there wasn’t the same hustle and bustle in a small town as there is in the big city but apparently clod-dom is alive and well in this little hick town. I shouldn’t be surprised but I have to say when I saw that old man running ahead of me I was amazed to the point of speechlessness. I’m not sure I will get over it. All I can say is that I behaved like a lady and didn’t say a word but if looks could wither they would have all three turned into shrivelled bits of corn.

By the way, I’ve seen the same sort of smarmy behaviour in the Tim Horton lineup. Men in expensive business suits slithering up the line looking for someone they might remotely know, then they chat them up and yes, they sneak ahead in the lineup. I think the same thing, uncouth clods. Warren K. Cook or not, you are nothing but a clod in a suit. I mentally see the hayseeds falling out of their hair and mud clunking off their sparkling black shoes. You can dress them up but you still can’t make a gentleman out of a clod. That comes from within.

So, are you a gentleman or a clod? Women are watching you for the answer.