My Mother

This woman I know (that would be ME) has the good fortune to have the Best Mother in the World. No, I am not going to get all mushy on you. The truth is that last night I was scolding my mother like a Fury. I had received an email from Jeanette yesterday asking me to call Mum in the middle of my morning to make sure she goes to the doctor. So I emailed back “Why?” (naturally!) All I got back was “I’m really worried about her.” So I got on my cellphone, something I seldom do, and managed to get the barrier known as John, and talked with Mum. She was getting ready for a 10:45 appointment with the doctor so I knew that Jeanette had got through to her the urgency of getting a checkup.

For the last couple of weeks Mum has been throwing up almost nightly. She has a herniated esophagus (I think that’s what it is called) and it is acting up on her. She had vaguely mentioned that she MIGHT go to the doctor to get an appointment for another scope but of course she never has made the appointment. I’ve been at her to start eating yogurt again because she has stopped doing that (who knows why). Always excuses.

I made my follow up call after supper last night to get the scoop. Here’s how it went:

Me So what did the doctor say?

Mum She gave me all kinds of test. Eight. Blood samples. Eight of those things, you know.

Me But what did she say it was?

Mum Well she gave all these tests. Eight. How long will it take to get them back? They never call me back. I hope this doctor will call me back.

Me Did she say what she thought it might be?

Mum She thinks it might be the, you know, the ecosphgus (that’s not be typing wrong, that’s her getting the word all mixed up, she can be just like Archie sometimes but most of the time she is like Edith).

Me Did she say you should get a scope?

Mum She said maybe I should see a dietician.

You get the drift? I never seem to get a direct answer from her. But it got worse as we now started to talk about her eating more vegetables, particularly salads. I know, THIS, coming from The Salad Hater of All Time. However, I don’t have serious stomach problems like my mother! Mum thinks eating a carrot once a month is “eating her vegetables”. We went around and around in circles and the next thing I knew she was blaming it all on Stephen Harper!

There you go, if you don’t want me to go insane, DO NOT VOTE FOR STEPHEN HARPER. He’s the cause of all my mother’s stomach problems.

You just have to love my mother!

This is Mum with our Bob